10 Things That Happen to You When You’re an Awkward Person
You know that feeling when you’re getting your picture taken and you realize it’s actually a video? THAT’S HOW I FEEL ALL THE TIME. So please know that I’m not writing this to hate on awkward people — I AM AN AWKWARD PERSON. But being awkward can have it’s upsides, too. Some people find you charming, and at least you’re not a cocky asshole! #SilverLining Here are something things that you’ll do if you truly are an awkward person:
You’ll fall over something at least once in your life
Your limbs and brain don’t always match up, which makes events like tripping or accidentally hitting yourself in the face inevitable. You’ll look around to see if anyone saw you. Oh, they did. THEY DID. Bonus points if you pretend that you’re not hurt or if your face turns bright red.
You’ll wave at someone who isn’t waving at you
You’re going to see someone waving and immediately think it’s to you. Do you know this person? No. But you’re still going to wave back with enthusiasm. WITH ENTHUSIASM, I SAY!
You’ll blurt something out at an inopportune moment
Instead of playing it cool with your crushes, you just come out with, “Hey, I really like you and think you are super cool and I think about you all the time!” You have a knack for making any situation uncomfortable for all involved. It’s like a superpower except terrible.
You’ll freak out over silence in conversations
Other people can handle ebbs and flows in conversation with grace and ease. You start to sweat the second you can’t come up with anything to say. In your head you think, “Just say something!” and end up blurting out, “So, wow, sure is hot today, huh?” *facepalm*
You’ll get thrown off by things like handshakes and hugs
Is the other person trying to shake your hand or bump your fist? Should you go in for a hug? Is it okay for you to initiate? All of these interactions are incredibly difficult for you to navigate. You’ll probably just put your hand up for a high five while their back is turned and be forced to pretend like you were stretching.
You’ll misjudge moments
“This is the perfect time to go in for a kiss,” you’ll think as you gaze at the object of your affection. But as you lean in, you see the other person turn their face to you. Abort! Abort! You’ve incorrectly assessed a situation again!
You manage to screw up when meeting new people
You’ll do things like bring up all the internet stalking you’ve done on them, make fun of them when you don’t mean to do so, or be so nervous the other person thinks you’re being aloof. Once people get to know you, they start to love the awkward things about you, but these first impressions are not your strong suit.
When you’re in front of large crowds, bad things happen
Any time you have to be in front of a large crowd, it’s like a breeding ground for the awkward inside you. Your awkwardness is like, “Oh, hundreds of people are watching? Time to come out and play!”
You’re self conscious on the dance floor
You’re moving, but it’s like your body is locked into an unnatural position. You’re constantly scanning the room to try to figure out the right way to act and also know if people are watching/judging you.
You constantly want to dig a hole in which you could hide
If you were a turtle, you’d spend a lot of time hiding up in that shell.
If you don’t feel too awkward about it, tweet me your awkward stories on Twitter.