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10 Things Justin Bieber WOULD Say "Never" To

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If it were up to Justin Bieber, none of us would never ever say never. To your dreams or giving up on anything ever — You should just never say it… it’s like real negative, yo. Following these clichéd words of wisdom has worked out quite well for Justin Bieber. So much so that he has a song and a movie with those words as a title. Still, there are some things even he would have to say never to.


Giving Up His Teddy Ruxpin

Justin is a hardcore insomniac! The only thing that can send him off to dreamland is listening to Teddy Ruxpin and his sidekick, Grubby, sing him lullabies. In fact it was Teddy who first taught him to ‘never say never’! But think about it… isn’t it just as wrong to say never to ‘never saying never’? BAM! Justin just blew your mind Ruxpin!


Missing An Episode Of RuPaul’s Drag Race

He has a full time employee devoted just to making sure there are no Tivo mishaps. Justin is crazy addicted to the drama of the lip synch offs, but he also finds it comforting to watch the triumph of other boys who are often mistaken for girls.


Eating A Beef Tongue Sandwich

The only tongue that gets in Beiber’s mouth comes from Disney starlets and he plans on keeping it that way! Even when he’s much, much older and it starts getting a little pervy.


Going In A Hot Tub With Cast Of Jersey Shore

Sure you can ignore the invisible germs, but not the ones sitting right in front of you! The worst part of hot tubbing it with these drunken fools, though, is every time one of them says “Uh oh looks like we got a situation” you know that that person just peed in the water.


Getting A Six Pack

Justin didn’t wanna say never to this, but his genetics said never for him. Then he had to save face and say that he would never want a six-pack anyway. Kind of a “you can’t fire me, I quit” dealio.


Watching The Human Centipede

The only thing he fears more than this movie is elevators. And pretty much anything else that involves going up and down… wink wink.


Hooking Up With Susan Boyle

They actually have a lot in common—they’re really into fly music and both are secretly still into collecting Beanie Babies. But like I said before, he just can’t get with someone who isn’t down with Disney! The truth is though, even if she was down with Disney it still wouldn’t work. She kind of sounds like Fat Bastard from Austin Powers when she speaks and Justin would just die laughing whenever they tried to have sexy time.


Starring In A Reality Dating Show

Come on Justin! I’m sure Bret Michaels would’ve said the same thing at the height of his fame! Talk to me in 24 years when you’re a forty year old virgin.


Bullying Casey Heynes

Bieber is well known for his bad a** antics… you don’t piss off the Bieb unless you wanna be taken down by the fearsome onslaught of his middle finger. Bieber could probably take Casey in a water balloon fight but if he tried anything more—body-slam! Personally I would love to see Casey go from hero to saint.



Part of his appeal is that tween girls find him completely non-threatening. Justin knows that nothing scares them more than hair in new places and boobies sprouting up. On them… or the boy they love.

What are some other things you thing Justin Bieber would say never to? Let us know in the comment!

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