31 of the Funniest Things ‘Dog People’ Have Ever Said About Dogs
The internet may be the virtual church we hoomans go to to worship cats, but there are a healthy number of dog people out there who voice their incredibly relatable obsession over their
favorite domestic quadrupeds online too! Check out the funniest things dog people have ever said about dogs on the internet!
[while being tackled by police dog] what's his name?
— brent (@murrman5) July 3, 2017
When you're at a party and the dog comes downstairs pic.twitter.com/t2E13mhD4k
— Pryce (@nickpryce4) February 27, 2016
Just heard a guy at the dog park tell his dog "NO!" and then more quietly, "We talked about this!"
— J.D. Altman (@NicCageMatch) April 10, 2014
“So weird! He never does this!” – a person whose dog jumps on people all day, every day, as it jumps on you
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) January 20, 2013
Squirrel Hell and Dog Heaven are the same place
— Rad Kyle (@KyleMcDowell86) August 7, 2015
In 34 years I've said I love you to two women and every dog I've ever seen.
— Matt Monroe (@heymonroe) April 1, 2016
I only work out so I'm strong enough to hold every breed of dog like a baby.
— Mike Primavera (@primawesome) August 10, 2015
FAKE BREEDS I'VE TOLD PEOPLE MY DOG IS AT THE DOG PARK: Venetian Dabney, Brown Feta, Waxbeard, Oxnard Pike, Blue Hustler, High Presbyterian
— Karen Kilgariff (@KarenKilgariff) July 24, 2013
When dogs sniff pee on a tree, that's like their facebook.
— Alec Sulkin (@thesulk) February 7, 2011
Hi, I spend 3 minutes every day choosing a TV channel to leave on for my dog, then I go to work and people take me seriously as an adult.
— Damien Fahey (@DamienFahey) November 4, 2014
Would still pet pic.twitter.com/74L3efb87q
— Matson Hunter (@MatsonHunter) September 13, 2016
My life is a constant battle of wanting to pet a dog and not wanting to talk to its owner.
— Lindsay (@Rollinintheseat) January 23, 2016
i hope this dog can’t see how often i check his instagram
— Hippo (@InternetHippo) April 12, 2016
[runs into friends with baby]
Me: OMG WHO'S THIS LITTLE GUY.
Friends:*picks up baby* wanna hold him?
Me:*kneeled next to dog* what?
— Spanky McDutcherson (@thatdutchperson) March 7, 2016
Thinking about how many more dogs I could pet if I was an octopus.
— ghost mom (@radtoria) February 7, 2016
Sorry I'm late I saw a puppy and stopped to pet it for 11 hours
— Licensed Esthetician (@SortaBad) October 10, 2014
Maybe next time i could meet your dog
Your dog is so cool
Do u mind if me & your dog hung out without you
— Lazy dog (@LaziestCanine) October 22, 2015
"So I pretended to throw a ball and caught the exact moment my dog realised I had betrayed him…" pic.twitter.com/RprzRCV3pK
— Baby Animals (@BabyAnimalPics) June 16, 2015
[DOG MAGICIAN] think of a color, any color…is it…gray?
[OTHER DOG] oh my GOD
— Cat Damon (@CornOnTheGoblin) January 25, 2015
None of the dogs who lost at the dog show know they lost or that they're at a dog show or that they're dogs.
— Ari Scott (@ariscott) November 28, 2013
This dog just told me how and when I'm going to die pic.twitter.com/SAbwd8yJlB
— Hunter (@hunterwits) September 21, 2016
I'd pay $10,000 per ticket if instead of people the airplane was filled with dogs to play with
— Licensed Esthetician (@SortaBad) December 27, 2014
I wish there was a way to keep in touch with dogs I meet outside of grocery stores.
— Mike Primavera (@primawesome) January 26, 2016
The news: death, destruction, injured dog, arson…
Me: Wait. Is the dog going to be ok?
— Ponies and Martinis (@PonyMartini) April 12, 2016
hold on. shh. stop talking. theres a dog in my field of vision and i have to look at it until its gone
— leon 🐣 (@leyawn) July 20, 2013
A race to the death, except my dog and me chasing one M&M I dropped on the floor.
— Jo 💫 (@Just__J0) May 4, 2016
Based on how he reacts, you'd think my dog's entire family was killed by pizza delivery guys.
— bananafanafofisa (@lisaxy424) May 16, 2016
When your dog starts to look just like you. pic.twitter.com/5oRS1Gn427
— Noelani G (@noelaniig) December 8, 2015
Took my dog to a bonfire and as he sat there staring at it blankly I realized he loves sticks. I was burning a giant pile of his toys.
— several onions (@Amusitr0n) March 19, 2016
Every time you shake hands with a dog u r entering into a dog contract whos stipulations u could never understand
— Honestly, tanks (@Burger_Time_) January 24, 2015
Which dog-loving post did you relate to the most? Tweet us @Smosh!