6 of the Strangest World Records of Farting
There are world records for everything, and that includes farting. I don’t know why I thought of looking these up, but here you are reading them, so you don’t judge me and I won’t judge you. I should warn you though — I cannot guarantee the authenticity of any of this information. It all came from the internet. There are no peer-reviewed journals about gaseous world records (yet). Now let’s watch some videos of people farting.
1. Top YouTube Result for Longest Fart – 59 seconds
Let’s start with the big one: the longest fart. Paul Oldfield, known as Mr. Methane, is a PROFESSIONAL FARTER WHO SET THE WORLD RECORD FOR THE LONGEST FART. I just needed to put that in caps to emphasize how f*cking insane it all is. A professional farter. Who set the world record for longest fart (or so he claims). Listen to the video above and decide for yourself.
2. ACTUAL Longest Fart Recorded on Video – 2 minutes, 42 seconds
Despite Mr. Methane’s claim to the longest fart, while doing my in-depth research for this article, I kept coming across the name Bernard Clemmens, who is credited with an impossibly long fart. For a long time, at least between five and 10 minutes, I thought Bernard was an urban legend. But he’s real, he has a YouTube channel, and it’s called Fart Master. He recorded himself squeezing out a 2 and a half minute long fart, which, in his own words, beat his previous record and Mr. Methane’s put together. He just isn’t as good at SEO as Mr. Methane. What a sad world we live in when the best farter in the world goes unrecognized because he isn’t as good of a marketer as the second best farter.
3. Longest Fart Completely Unsubstantiated by Any Evidence: 2 minutes and 56 seconds
Bernard Clemmens himself says that the longest fart is 14 seconds longer than his record, which would make it 2 minutes and 56 seconds long. He didn’t provide any evidence for this claim and I haven’t found it anywhere else, but I don’t see why Clemmens would lie. He could just claim the world’s longest fart for himself. It would certainly help his YouTube rankings.
4. Longest mouth fart: 1 minute, 22.47 seconds
Pavol Durdik of Puchov, Slovakia produced the world’s longest fake fart using his mouth in 2016, lasting for an impressive 1 minute and 22.47 seconds. Real talk, my dog was fascinated by this video.
5. Most armpit farts in 20 seconds – 77
Nick Taylor of Crab Orchard, West Virginia, completed 77 armpit farts in 20 seconds in 2014 while making a very serious face.
6. Most armpit farts in 30 seconds – 114
Hayden Pester of Orange, California accomplished 114 armpit farts in 30 seconds back in 2011. At a pace of 3.8 armpit farts per second, it’s neck and neck with Nick Taylor’s 3.85 armpit farts per second. Two young men who are truly world class in their field. Simply inspiring.
7. World record for the most fart videos you can watch in bed next to your girlfriend before she starts to hate you – 2
My girlfriend was sitting next to me in bed and really was not having it anymore by the second video. I watched Mr. Methane performing his farts on France’s Got Talent and she honestly looked like she didn’t know me anymore. Full disclosure, I also watched a video of a girl pooping on a roller coaster. It was recommended from the fart videos and I could not help myself.
There are so many fart-related world records — most balloons popped by shooting a dart from a tube propelled by a fart (1), most fart sounds made over the “Going Rogue” audio book in one minute (47), and most lit candles extinguished by farting (5). It’s truly an impressive field. Which record impressed you the most? Tweet at me and let me know @erikaheidewald!