Funny Articles

8 Strangest REAL Addictions

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So when I'm  not reading about Astrobiology or bottle-feeding orphaned kittens, I'm probably watching Hoarders or Toddlers and Tiaras or My Strange Addiction. I like to keep my life balanced, don't you? Well, the people who generously share their stories with us on My Strange Addictions definitely do NOT keep their lives balanced. I'm addicted to this show. And not in a strange way. Here's a look at 8 of the strangest REAL addictions.  


Widow Addicted To Eating Husband's Ashes

Casie's Husband died. That's really sad. She carries his cremains with her wherever she goes. They watch TV together and she cooks the cremains all of "his" favorite foods. That's really, really sad. Oh yeah, and she also eats the ashes. Of her dead husband. I guess that's one way of moving on. After watching her lick her dead husband of of her fingers, I had to move on to the toilet bowl because I couldn't stop gagging. You've been warned!


Addicted To Being An Adult Baby

Who doesn't want to be a baby again? No responsibilities! You get to play and suck your binky all day for comfort! And you get to wear diapers, so no more hassle of constantly having to leave Elmo's World to go use the big girl potty! Well, except for that last part, I'm with you Riley! Those feetie pajamas look warm!


Eating Rocks

Teresa eats about 2 pounds of rocks a day. And she has the broken teeth and digestive problems to prove it!  I'm pretty sure this isn't what the FDA means when the say we should get our vitamins and minerals from whole foods!


Drinking Nail Polish

Bertha takes nail polish shots. She sips it like a fine wine. And she licks it right off the brush. Seriously? This article is gonna be the death of me! If been gagging since 'dead husband ashes' and I've still got 4 entries to go!


Man Who Is Addicted To His 'Real Doll'

Davecat (Seriously? Are people going by chatroom names now?)  can NOT live without his synthetic wife. They're like soulmates or something.  It's like that movie Lars and the Real Girl, only real and more disturbing than darkly funny. And WAY less hot without Ryan Gosling.  But then again everything is less hot without Ryan Gosling. 


Eating Couch Cushions

Adele is addicted to eating couch cushions. Yup, you heard me right!  I might be able to understand this if you told me that couch cushions tasted like Taco Bell's new Doritos Tacos Locos or something.  But they don't look like they're covered in orange powdery deliciousness, so I'm thinking not. Adele says she likes the darker cushion sections because they have more flavor…and…I'm out!  Deep breaths.


Sniffing Baby Powder

Jaye's friends and family were concerned she had a drug problem when they noticed white powder around her home and on her nose. Boy were they probably NOT relieved to discover that she was only sniffing baby powder!  She estimates in the last 16 years that she's sniffed over 1,125 pounds of talcum powder. Tony Montana is impressed!


Man Is Addicted To His Car…INTIMATELY

There is no prouder moment in a father's life than when his son becomes a man and introduces his family to the woman he loves. Unless that "woman' is a car and this introduction is made on a nationally-televised show! Sorry Nathaniel! But no one can accept man/car love. Especially when  it's with a 1998 Monte Carlo. Maybe if it was a million dollar Ferrari Enzo.

Which is your favorite strange addiction? Let me know @desijedeikin or in the comments below!

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