9 Celebrities That Are Secretly Pokemon
There are all sorts of ridiculous conspiracies surrounding the shady side of Hollywood. Most of them are so out there that it's completely unbelievable. I recently saw one that is definitely true. Most of our favorite Hollywood celebs are secretly Pokemon. It's true! Here are celebs that are secretly Pokemon.
There are all sorts of rumors about John Travolta, but his biggest secret is that he's part of a giant Dugtrio. He keeps the other twos heads hidden under his shirt. The John Travolta Dugtrio is the reason for most of the earthquakes in Southern California.
I know most of you hate his music, but maybe you should consider this one thing. Justin Bieber's music is terrible for a human, but great for a Pokemon. Most Pokemon can only say their own name. He has at least twenty other words he can say like "Yeah" and "Baby".
Of course, everyone that fights Brock Lesnar is terrified of him. He's definitely a Machoke. He's used to fighting other Pokemon with insane special abilities. What chance does a regular old human have of defeating him?
Snooki is probably the most dangerous Pokemon on this list. I legitimately fear the day when she finally evolves in to the dreaded Snooking. The fire and destruction brought upon the world will be like nothing we have ever seen.
No human could have bangs like that. Is there a hair type Pokemon? Why don't I have bangy flowing locks like Zooey?!?!! If she's not a hair type Pokemon, then she's definitely an eye type Pokemon cause I heard that she can pop her eyes out of her head and make them fly in to you. It's pretty gross, but an effective way to win a Pokemon battle.
Verne Troyer was formerly one of the Digletts that make up the John Travolta Dugtrio. He broke off a while ago to try to form his own Dugtrio, but it never worked out.
Michael Phelps is a great swimmer for a human. He's really not that great for a Pokemon. I know the IOC has strict drug testing standards, but I don't think the atheletes have ever been tested to see if they are a Pokemon. He has 22 Olympic Gold Medals. When he's finally found out, this will be one of the biggest scandals in sports history.
Most people don't realize Taylor Swift is a Meloetta. That's the reason Kayne got so upset that Taylor Swift won the VMA for Best Female Video. He's an known Pokemon hater. IF you look at the fine print of the rules for the VMAs, it doesn't technically say that you have to be human to win.
Anthony and Ian
Why else do you think Anthony and Ian are such Pokemon superfans? It's so obvious. Anthony is an Onix, and Ian is a Mr. Mime. Duh!
What celebs do you think are secretly pokemon? Let me know on twitter @zachlunch or in the comments below!