Funny Articles

Craziest Japanese Vending Machines!

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Vending machines in America have pretty much two things: snacks or soda. When it comes to vending machines we are a bland culture. The Japanese howevever, when it comes to vending machines, pretty much got that sh*t on lock.


Live Lobsters


It's like a regular claw machine, only instead of a stuffed animal, you win a tasty seafood dinner!


Your Fortune


There are many of these fortune telling vending machines in Japan. I bet almost every fortune you get reads, "For this same price you could be eating a Snickers right now."


Toilet Paper


Japanese people have to take emergency craps pretty much 24/7.




Japanese people are pretty used to porn, what with how in-your-face and over the top all their fetishes are  so no one bats an eye at machines filled with filthy magazines!


Rhinoceros Beetles


How many times have you said to yourself at a vending machine, "I guess I'll get these Ruffles, but what I really wanted was a pet male Rhinoceros Beetle," at which point you, like most of us, fell to your knees and cursed in vain at the unforgiving sky. The brawny beetles are a popular pet for children in Japan.


Used School Girl Panties


These vending machines began appearing around Japan in 1993 but were eventually made illegal when Japanese officials decided that they didn't want Japan to become, "So consistently awesome we make every other country feel like crap about themselves."


The Vending Machine That Can't Be Defeated


Why try to get your soda from a regular vending machine when you can try to get your soda from a vending machine that can fight back! Plus they have a special! If you live through the battle you get a free second soda of lesser or equal value! So far NO ONE HAS RECEIVED THE SPECIAL.


What would you like to see in vending machines? Let us know in the comments!

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