Funny Articles

Man Gets Arm Implants For iPod Nano!

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Well, humanity, it’s been fun, but it looks like the inevitable evolution of our species into androids has begun. We’re on our way to melding with machines in ways our grandparents could have never even conceived of. In about 30 years the Space President is going to make headlines when he endorses android marriage.

android president obama
“Many of my daughters’ friends have parents who are over 75 percent cybernetics,
and that’s the kind of thing that forces a change in perspective.”


Dave Hurban has surgically implanted four magnets into his wrist to hold his iPod Nano without the use of a wristband. The iPod is now a part of him. Sort of. I mean, it’s a first step to the iPod being apart of him. He calls it iDermal, which is Greek for “Apple skin”. Now all Hurban has to do is lift his wrist to input commands into his iPod. No word yet on if the iPod is able to send commands back.

ipod on wrist magnet
A door once created can open both ways.

Guys, I’m not buyin’ it. No way is this only for an iPod Nano. Because, straight up, wristbands exist and come in many shapes and sizes. And it’s not about being a hipster individual vis a vis innovative body modifications. The only visible part of this is an iPod Nano. If there’s one thing hipsters hate more than the mainstream, it’s product placement.

ipod displayed on wrist
That’ll go over great at the Times New Viking show there, sport.

No, I think the iDermal was created to address a more primal fear. A fear mankind has let consume him since the very beginnings of our species— what if we’re climbing a building and our electric rubber gloves come off like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol?

tom cruise mission impossible climbing
“I’d feel better if I had magnets in my wrist. Are buildings made of metal? Anyhow. Next time. Magnets.”

Would you install magnets in your wrist? Even if it was a system requirement for the new OS X? Let me know on Twitter or leave a comment below!

Check out Is Apple Set to Release a Mini-iPad?