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Did You Know These Famous Movie Quotes Were Never Actually Said

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Almost everyone has heard the quote “Play it again, Sam” from the movie “Casablanca.” But not everyone knows that line was never said in the film. In fact, every day we misquote movies, either because we weren’t listening carefully, we’re quoting someone else who misquoted them, or frankly we all have lives to lead and don’t have the time to memorize every line from every movie. But now here’s your chance to finally say the following dialogue correctly, only for your friends to respond, “I don’t think that’s right.”

 

“Luke, I am your father”

Darth Vader telling Luke he is his father in The Empire Strikes Back

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Movie: “The Empire Strikes Back”

Actual Quote: “No, I am your father.”

Reason for Misquote: Because randomly quoting “No, I am your father” to everyone without any context just makes it sound like you are very adamant about how often you donated to your local sperm bank in the past.

 

“I want to suck your blood.”

Bela Lugosi in Dracula

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Movie: “Dracula”

Actual Quote: Dracula never says anything like it in the movie.

Reason for Misquote: As it turns out, one of the most famous lines in horror movie history was never uttered. In fact, nothing close to that quote was said in the film, not even “I want to drink your blood,” You know what’s good for sucking? Blood” or “You suck, he sucks, this whole day sucks, but at least there’s some blood around here.” More than likely the made-up line was created as a way to imitate lead actor Bela Lugosi’s Hungarian accent, which certainly could sound menacing even while he wore what appears to be the maître d’ outfit from a two-star restaurant.

 

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall – who is the fairest of them all?”

the evil queen’s magic mirror in Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

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Movie: “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs”

Actual Quote: “Magic mirror, on the wall – who is the fairest one of all?”

Reason for Misquote: It’s an admittedly slight difference, but one can see how starting with “Mirror, mirror” makes the quote seem more like a kid’s nursery rhyme while simply saying “Magic Mirror” makes you wonder if the mirror would respond in complete exasperation, “Why do you keep calling me by job title? We’ve been over this a million times! My name’s Terrence!”

 

“We’re gonna need a bigger boat”

Roy Scheider and the great white shark in Jaws

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Movie: “Jaws”

Actual Quote: “You’re gonna need a bigger boat.”

Reason for Misquote: It’s more fun to say “We’re” instead of “You” because that way it sounds inclusive, like you’re all in on it together, even if that “it” is imminent devouring. But when you make it specific and say “You’re gonna need a bigger boat” it sounds rather snide, as if it will be quickly followed with “Dumbass.”

 

“Me Tarzan, you Jane.”

Jane and Tarzan in Tarzan the Ape Man

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Movie: “Tarzan the Ape Man”

Actual Quote: Short summary of a longer exchange between Tarzan and Jane.

Reason for Misquote: In fact, it’s a much, much, MUCH shorter version of the introduction between the two characters that goes on forever, involving a prolonged and non-too-riveting lesson on the concept of personal pronouns. Not to mention the misquote started when “Tarzan” actor Johnny Weissmuller told a magazine interviewer that “Me Tarzan, you Jane” was the extent of how much he really had to act in the movie.

 

“Greed is good.”

Gordon Gekko giving is greed speech in Wall Street

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Movie: “Wall Street”

Actual Quote: “The point is, ladies and gentlemen, that greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right, greed works.”

Reason for Misquote: Clearly far too long for anyone to quote at a party before the other guests give the host the look that reads, “Why the hell did you invite him?”, it was shortened to “Greed is good” because not only does that quickly satirize the materialistic 80’s but could also easily fit on shirts or mugs to make even more quick cash.

 

“Beam me up, Scotty”

Captain Kirk using his tricorder in the TV series Star Trek

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Movie: Every single original cast “Star Trek” movie or TV show

Actual Quote: Almost every other conceivable version, including “Scotty, beam us up,” “Beam us up, Scotty” and probably “For @%$# sake, Scotty, get us the @%$# out of here!”

Reason for Misquote: One can easily imagine William Shatner thinking only of himself while saying, “Beam me up, Scotty,” leaving Spock and McCoy alone on a harsh, violent planet, muttering, “Bastard” under their breath.

 

Which one was your favorite? Let me know in the comments!

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