Funny Articles

Old People in Japan Getting into Blow Darts!

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Imagine the horror of being elderly in Japan. You've spent your entire life focused on your career and ignored your family to do so. Now, after you've retired, and your relationship with your kids can be described as, at best, chilly, you can't even go outside and enjoy the world because your body is so broken down you can hardly move. How can you hope to find purpose in your life when the only thing you can do is breathe?


using blow gun



Yes, blowing darts, or "Fukiya" as I would call it if I were absolutely insufferable, has become hugely popular in Japan's elderly population. Over 30,000 people, with an average age of 70, have become members of various blow dart clubs around the country in the last five years. I'm so thankful this is happening in 2012 and in Japan, because if this fad had started when The Golden Girls was still on we would have to put up with some disgusting puns.


golden girls

"I haven't blown anything since—"



While the sports popularity is expected to continue growing, blow darting is in the odd position of only needing to maintain it's current numbers to consider it's popularity growing. Some of the, uh, new recruits will balance out the, uh, departing members, I guess is what I'm getting at.


japanese funeral



This is a surprisingly great thing for Japan. Here in America, we don't have sports for our old people. We couldn't possibly give any less of a sh*t about our old people. Hell, my grandma's lived in some Christian married couple's freezer for the last 8 years and this is literally the first time I've thought about that since she told me 8 1/2 years ago.


empty freezer

"I'll bet you can curl up real small, can't you Betty?"


What other ways can the elderly find to stave off thoughts of death? Let me know on twitter @mikeyfromsu or in the comments below!



Check out Japan Wants You to Put Your Phone In This, Like, Hug Robot, I Guess?