Funny Articles

Porgs Are the Only Thing That Matters in Star Wars Now

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Listen up, Star Wars fans: you’ve got a new favorite, like it or not. Last night, during Monday Night Football, a new trailer dropped for Star Wars: The Last Jedi. And if you haven’t already, you better check it out, because it shows off a new creature. In fact, this new creature is the creature — no, the character — the entire saga has been building to. Ladies and gentlemen, at 1:32 in this video, bear witness to… the Porg.

Holy. F*cking. Sh*tballs. This little Porgy-Porg is the cutest thing I ever laid my goddamn eyes on. Look at him again. Look at him:

star wars porg
LOOK AT HIM.< br />

This is what Star Wars is all about: cute little punnums you can just squeeze the cute little cheek of and snuggle with until all your nightmares go away forever. Porg is our new favorite character not just in Star Wars, but in all media.

star wars porg john marsden
Sorry John Marston, you were complex and layered, but ultimately, I do not want to give you little kisseys on your forehead.< br />

Granted, we know nothing about the Porg, and have no clue how big or little this specific Porg’s role will be in The Last Jedi. But it doesn’t matter — even if he literally just appears for that one second to scream in the Millennium Falcon and then doesn’t show up for the rest of the movie, Porgs are so cute that fans will demand their presence in future Star Wars movies. Remember what happened with Boba Fett?

star wars porgs boba fett
Boba Fett’s part was so small in Empire Strikes Back, he was actually played by a lamp and a blanket.< br />

How much do you love the Porgs, huh? I bet it’s a lot. Let us know on Twitter @Smosh!