SHOWDOWN: Who Would You Rather See Abe Lincoln Slay: Bella Or Edward?
The incredibly bizarre sounding movie Abe Lincoln: Vampire Slayer is coming out this weekend and I have to say…I'm intrigued. I'm down with seeing some vampires slayed! Especially if their names rhyme with Fella Fawn and Bedward Bullen. I mean who wants to see some random oldey-timey vamp killed when it could be one of these fools? But…you can only PICK ONE! Therein lies the rub! So who do you loathe the most?
As a female person, I have particular disdain for Miss Swan. Or Mrs. Cullen. Yuck. I mean, she is so passive, boring and expressionless they had to get Kristen Stewart to play her! I feel bad sometimes wishing her the true death, but then again she kind of BEGGED for it. In her own wimpering, passionless way. No one will miss her. Even her evil spawn Renessme.
For sullying the reputation of vampires, devoted boyfriends and Cedric Diggory, Edward Cullen deserves to be taken out in the most brutal way possible. I suggest sandpapering off all of his sparkle before ripping his heart out. Too much? The added bonus of an Edward slaying is the misery it'll cause Bella. Actually…do we really need to see her moping around for the rest of her immortal life? BAH!
So who would you rather see get staked? Choose wisely and VOTE in the poll below!