Sitcom Sidekicks from the 80’s and 90’s: Where Are They Now?
Well, kids, it’s summer. And if you’re anything like me, you’ve been taking advantage of the season by blocking out the garish light of day, cranking up the A/C, creating a sweet ass-groove in the couch and watching a mind-numbing amount of reruns. You made the right choice. By now, I’m sure you’ve been wondering what your favorite sitcom sidekicks of the 80’s and 90’s are up to – the only thing preventing you from finding out, though, is your inability to get up from said couch. Wonder no more, friend – I’ve done all the legwork for you.
Six LeMeure (Jenna von Oy) from Blossom
Blossom’s BFF now fancies herself a country musician – she’s released two whole albums of original material (well, an album and an EP). Last month, she had a kid and blogged about it on People Magazine's website (which, for reasons I can’t comprehend, describes her as a "celebrity blogger"). She has 2,378 followers on Twitter (191 less than yours truly). According to her website, she attended “the prestigious USC film school” for two years. Unless she’s some kind of super genius, which I fear she is not, I think that means she didn’t graduate.
Kimmy Gibbler (Andrea Barber) from Full House
We all knew Gibbler was a feminist – it turns out the dame who played her is one, too. After hanging up Kimmy’s scrunchie, Barber got herself a masters degree in Women's Studies from the University of York in England. She now lives in England with her hubby and two wee ones. She has way more followers than Jenna von Oy on Twitter. Her last film project was 1995's The Skateboard Kid II.
Sam Anders (Sean O'Neal) from Clarissa Explains it All
In the years that transpired since bicycle shorts were a thing, Clarissa’s platonic male companion did some voice work for what I can only assume were two anime series (because a show called RahXephon can only be anime). He claims to have turned down a chance to be the lead in an Orlando boy band, right before N'Sync and Backstreet Boys hit it big (WHOOPS). He’s really into musical theater. His personal website currently has one of those "under construction" animated GIFs on it…and nothing else.
Ellen Hickle (Alison Fanelli) from Pete and Pete
She's a doctor, dude – at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia. And, according to her Wikipedia page, she’s also an "accomplished oboist." Well, la-di-da. Looks like someone’s too good for basic cable!
Paul Pfeiffer (Josh Saviano) from The Wonder Years
No, for the last time, he's not Marilyn Manson. Actually, he’s just the opposite. He went to Yale, where he majored in political science and was president of the Sigma Nu Fraternity (he’s not a nerd; he just plays one on TV). After Yale, he got his law degree – now he’s "Senior Counsel" (whatever that means) for some fancy pants law office in New York City. Again, la-di-da.
Screech Powers (Dustin Diamond) from Saved by the Bell
God…where to begin? The Screechman’s life post-SBTB has been pretty bleak. In 2006, he released his own sex tape (Screeched: Saved by the Smell). He’s made cameo appearances in horrible movies like Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star and direct-to-DVD American Pie sequels. He’s debased himself on Celebrity Fit Club and Hulk Hogan's Celebrity Championship Wrestling. He wrote a tell-all book that, like his porno, had a pun in the title ("Behind the Bell"). He was a host at last year's Gathering of the Juggalos. Pity him.
Steve Urkel (Jaleel White) from Family Matters
DROP EVERYTHING: Urkel’s personal website features a Flash animation of him standing atop a skyscraper eating Doritos. When you access the "Blog" section of his site, all you get is a message that reads, "I don't know… I'm on the fence about this section." Apparently he was just on Dancing With the Stars – he also hosts a game show on the Sci Fi network. Short story long, he’s DOIN' PRETTY WELL. He still looks weird as hell, though.
Carlton Banks (Alfonso Ribeiro) from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
After the Fresh Prince went stale, Alfonso got himself a degree from Cal State Los Angeles (Go Golden Eagles!). Since 2008, he's been hosting a game show on the Game Show Network called Catch 21. A couple months ago, he participated in a "Carlton Dance" flash mob at Universal Studios CityWalk. In 2003, he starred in a McDonald's commercial for McGriddle sandwiches. He’s really into race car driving. Yawn.
Salem the Cat from Sabrina the Teenage Witch
When Sabrina jumped ship, the magic left his life. He started hanging out with the wrong crew and developed a cat nip addiction that he just couldn’t shake – at the end of his life, he was an alley cat. What a waste.
Know any juicy details about the present lives of past celebrities? Let me know in the comments, or tell me @Bornferal!