Funny Articles

‘Slender Man’ Trailer: Full of Gross-Out Maggots and Other Creepy Stuff!

By  | 

Slender Man, the creepypasta monster who makes up for not having a face by having extra long arms, has been creeping on us internet-dwellers for almost a decade. But I only just realized I don’t know if there’s any kind of official Slender Man canon. Does he have specific powers? Is he a Michael Myers-type serial killer, or a Freddy Krueger-type reality-warper? How does kidnapping kids make him feel? What are Slender Man’s hopes, wants, and dreams?

slender man movie slender man
“Little Ghost Girl, have you ever thought of just, I don’t know, opening a bakery?”< br />

All of these questions will presumably not be answered in the upcoming Slender Man movie. But there is a trailer at least! And man is it ever full of some spooky-ass stuff. Take a look:

There are a lot of maggots and eyeball-pokes and haunting child singing going on in this trailer. It almost feels like this movie is just going to be a tone piece about, I don’t know, the general idea of foreboding?

And maybe that’s the move for a Slender Man movie — two hours of vaguely unsettling images and nondescript outlines of a long-limbed man in a foggy forest. That captures the experience of staying up late and reading creepypastas, right? It’s not like you follow a single story — you just bop around the internet, look at a picture of a Smile Dog, and feel generally afraid. Honestly, this trailer’s bizarre mish-mash of nightmare stuff is everything I could ever want out of a creepypasta movie.

Well, almost. There’s one thing I do during jump scares I’d love to see brought into the movie.

During the jump scares, I hope this video plays in another window.< br />

Does this look like the Slender Man movie you were hoping for? Let us know on Twitter @Smosh!