Funny Articles

Teen Sexting Actually NOT That Common??

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Have you guys heard of this "sexting" thing? Apparently, kids today are taking pictures of themselves without any clothes on and sending them to their pals. And sometimes those pictures end up on the internet and destroy those poor kids' lives. And for what? Good God, don't kids have enough to worry about, between the corrupting influence of video games, dogs with diseases, and non-organic milk?

"Is your child in danger? Find out tonight at 11."

Yes, sexting is the new big bad thing that every single kid today is doing. But here's the thing- not a lot of kids are doing it. A new study from the University of New Hampshire Crimes Against Children Research Center, unquestionably the least happy place on Earth, says that only about one percent of teens below the age of 18 are taking or sharing pictures with explicit nudity. What does this mean, then? Has sexting, like so many fads before it, already come and gone? Have n00d pix already been replaced by Lady Gaga remixes and big ole' granny smith apples?

I have no idea what kids today are into.

The University of New Hampshire also looked into how often sexting arrests occurred, and found that only 18 percent of sexting cases investigated by the police lead to an arrest. That number doubles to 36 percent, however, when the cases involve harassment or blackmail. Basically, you're more likely to get arrested for sexting if you're doing something illegal while sexting.

"You're under arrest for murder and sexting. Mostly murder."

It's odd that sexting is so prevalent that we all know what a word as ridiculous as "sexting" means. I think sexting is, for a lot of parents, the nightmare scenario. The idea that their kids are taking naked pictures of themselves and sending it to others, especially when they're young, is terrifying. So, if they watch the news, and hear about a kid doing it in New York, a kid doing it in Dallas, and a kid doing it in Seattle, then in that nervous parent's head it's an epidemic and children are it's only a matter of time before it happens to their kids.

"I don't remember when the movie is. I'll sext you the showtimes later."

Studies like this one are great because they give us a little bit of context. The odds are overwhelmingly in favor of your kids maintaining their innocence. So parents, feel free to chill out. Worry less about sexting and more about whether or not your kids are doing their homework. Taking enough extra curriculars to get into a good college. AND DRINKING NOTHING BUT ORGANIC MILK. Jesus, I almost forgot that one. JESUS.


What do you guys think about the sexting phenomenon? Or rather, the lack of a sexting phenomenon? Sext us your answers in the comments!


Check out Sexting, Mankini Added To The Oxford English Dictionary!?