Very Best Of FML: Batman Edition!
You know, since he's lost his parents, his girlfriend, and Harvey Dent, Gotham's symbol of hope, Batman is probably screaming "FML" pretty regularly.
I also have unfathomable wealth
Today, I was talking to my co-workers about how I've sadly been an orphan since an early age. One of them exclaimed, "Hey, just like Batman!" FML
Not the reply I deserve but the one I need right now
Today, after trying to find the perfect picture for the guy I have a huge crush on, I finally found one and sent it to him. His return picture? Himself in a Batman mask and sombrero. FML
Why do we fall, Bruce?
Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML
You're doing it wrong
Today, two random guys proclaiming that they were both Batman attacked me on the street. FML
Batman is the yummiest superhero
Today, my fiancé informed me he didn't want a regular wedding cake, he wants a Batman cake. I have nothing against this, except that he already decided the wedding theme would be Star Wars. Essentially, I'm marrying a child. FML
Some moms just want to watch the world burn
Today, we got a new dry-erase board, and I drew the Gotham City skyline complete with the Bat Signal. Later, I went downstairs, only to find my mom had written "BATMAN’S GAY" over the top of the picture. FML
And you thought GOTHAM'S reckoning was bad…
Today, I lent my parents a copy of "The Dark Knight", saying it was one of my favorite movies so they needed to watch it. A bit later my mom called… Apparently my roommate wanted to watch it as well, but couldn't find the case to his porno and decided to just use the Batman case instead. FML
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