Very Best Of FMyLife: Doll Edition
Dolls are fun little toys whose hair you can comb and comb until all the hair comes off but you still can't stop combing, but dolls can just as easily make you say F My Life! That's where FMylife comes in, collecting the worst moments of our lives, all in one place. Here are some of the best doll related FML moments this week!
So Are You Dead Now?
Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate hanging a voodoo doll of me on a noose. FML
I Guess That's Cheaper Than Splurging On Norton
Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML
So, He's Going To Be A Murderer
Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML
Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML
Today, my girlfriend got into a huge fight with her mom over the phone. After the fight, she looked ready to cry so I went over to comfort her. She went straight past me, and started confiding in her creepy, extremely expensive dolls instead. FML
Here's The Number To My Therapist
Today, my mom told me she can't wait for me to turn eighteen so she can turn my room into a place for her to display all her antique glass dolls. FML
I'd Still Hit
Today, I went on a date with a woman. She brought along her stuffed rabbit, and introduced us. FML
NOW SMASH HIM
Today, I gave my 7 year old a snowglobe. I had spent the last week deconstructing it, putting an action figure of his favorite cartoon character inside, and then putting it back together. Later, I find it smashed into pieces because he wanted to "play with the toy it came with." FML
You'll Make A Fine Janitor
Today, I played games on Barbie.com and gave up after 10 minutes. They were hard. FML
Always Look In The Window First
Today, I passed a car, and heard a baby crying in the back seat. It was hot and no one was around. All the doors were locked so I brokeit with a rock, cutting my arm and setting the alarm off. Only to find out that it was a realistic baby doll. I have to get 7 stitches andpay for the window. FML
For more, check out FMyLife.com!