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Very Best Of FMyLife: First Dates Edition

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First dates are an exciting time where you can explore your ability to romantically bond with another person and maybe touch a boob, but they can just as easily make you say F My Life! That's where FMylife comes in, collecting the worst moments of our lives, all in one place. Here are some of the best first date related FML moments this week!



Today, the guy I've had the biggest crush on came to my house to pick me up for our first date. As we were leaving, my father screams out "Do you still have diarrhea?" I don't have diarrhea. My dad thinks he's so funny. FML







15 Year Olds Should Only Have Dates In Tire Yards

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend. We'd just got our food when my dad walks in, comes up to our table and says, "I didn't say you could leave, you're too young to be dating him", then drags me out of the restaurant. We are both 15, and it was my first date. FML






Don't Wear A Dead Mouse For A Tie

Today, I went speed dating. I arrived at my first date and she looked me up and down and said, "Oh, that's awkward." FML








Don't Let Him Use It And You'll Have The Edge On The Date

Today, I went on a first date with a guy. He parked his truck and reached in his door side pocket and grabbed a little black zippered bag. Seeing this, I burst out laughing saying, "Wow, what's that, your change purse?" He replied, "No, I'm diabetic, this is my blood sugar monitor." FML






Were You Testing His Love?

Today, I went on the first date of my life. I also burped during my first kiss. FML








That's So Romantic

Today, my boyfriend told me he hasn't showered since our first date. We've been dating for three weeks. FML








As Long As He Doesn't Put Them Up His Nose

Today, I found out that some men think it's ok to clip their fingernails, at the table, in a restaurant, on a first date. FML









A Big Surprise!

Today, I had my first date with this guy I really like, who came to pick me up. Once I got into his car,my uncle comes out of the house and yells "Remember, pregnant girls aren't allowed to drink." FML







She Sounds Like A Slytherin To Me

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML






She Was Probably Too Impressed To Return

Today, I was on a first date with a girl at the movies. Trying to be polite,   held in a fart until an intense, loud action scene came on. As soon as I let go, the scene went silent and my fart was clearly heard to everyone in the movie theatre. My date went to the bathroom. She didn'tcome back. FML






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Check out last weeks Best Of FMyLife!