10 Best Break Up Songs for Guys!

A wise man named Sir Cee Lo Green once said, “F*ck you”. Which is the appropriate response to just about any unwelcomed break up. Countless songs have been written (whose lyrics have subsequently been shouted from bedrooms at 2am) about the anger and frustration a break up causes. But few of those songs capture how god damn manly it is to get dumped. Because as men, we have feelings too. We may not be sure what the hell they are at any given moment, but they exist. And they sure as hell deserve a baller soundtrack. So next time some girl dumps your Atari for an Xbox, open up a bottle of Jack and break stuff to the following… And if you need any moral support, or want to add something to the list, hit me up @Danborrelli

 

10.) BLINK 182 – DAMNIT

Hell yeah! This was the male equivalent of Single Ladies only awesomer and more awesome. A great first breakup song, it really captures the anger and the f*ck it mentality that goes along with trying to rationalize anything in high school. So while the rest of your classmates cry over some sh*tty Adele song; you can smoke cigarettes and shoot beer cans in the woods like a MAN!

 

9.) BUTCH WALKER – BEST THING YOU NEVER HAD

It’s emo AND country! Where else are you gonna get that baller breakup combo? This is for the part of the movie where they montage you walking in the rain, eating alone, sitting at a bar by yourself… Feel free to blast this when you think you’re alone only to have your nothing-more-than-friends buddy of the opposite sex walk in on you and catch you rocking out to it, making you realize she was the one you’re supposed to have been with all along.

 

8.) JOHNNY CASH (COVER) – HURT

Sometimes you just need to chill after a breakup. Get a little fat and get into some weird hobby like model trains; guys freak out too. And when that happens, you need a song that will bring you back down to Earth. Always remember, you may feel like you’ve lost it, but you can never lose it as much as one Johnny Cash.

 

7.) JAYHAWKS – BLUE

The 90s was a decade made for breakups. Amurrca was breaking up with everything; hell even our president wanted something new. But I can assure you, as Hil Clin was crying in the oval office, millions of bros all over Bro-merica were doing the very same to this song. Because god damnit were The Jayhawks catchy.

 

6.) Z-RO – I HATE YOU BITCH

Sometimes it’s not all tears and How I Met Your Mother reruns. Sometimes it’s anger, frustration, and the ability to just say, “I hate you, b*tch”. Z-Ro breaks it down. After everything you’ve done for her, she leaves. So don’t keep pining over her, just move on.

 

5.) BON IVER (COVER) – I CAN’T MAKE YOU LOVE ME

And we’re back to the crying, but with good reason. Once again Bon Iver comes through as being the most depressing f*cking person on the planet. The dude even made winning a Grammy look sad. However, your caring breakup counselor @danborrelli guarantees that just a few listens of this song will get you over anyone. It reminds you that there are bigger things, like learning how to play the piano well, or getting a sweet new beanie.

 

4.) THE HOLD STEADY – YOU CAN MAKE HIM LIKE YOU

I highly recommend this band to anyone who hasn’t heard them. They’re the perfect combination of bro-hugging cock-rock and insightful, poetic lyrics. They’re like if Springsteen just whipped it out on stage. And they help you get over anything. No matter what you’re going through, remember not to put the girl on a pedestal. Unless you plan on climbing up there yourself.

 

3.) REM – JUST, SERIOUSLY, ANYTHING BY REM

REM is the reason headphones were invented. You’re pissed off, you’re alone, and you can’t stop telling yourself how awful she was. You start to think of all the time wasted, and how all of your plans are no longer happening so now the future is just as f*cked. So you turn on High Fidelity, open up a Chuck Palahniuk book, and crank this sh*t. Because you can…

 

2.) MAGNETIC FIELDS – I DON’T WANT TO GET OVER YOU

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Here’s how it happens. You think you’re over it then you get a reminder. At first it’s real, a stowaway bobby pin or a strand of hair on the pillow. Then it gets worse, anything is a reminder. Stupid stufflike a food she liked that’s generic enough to only make sense to your subconscious who wants you to feel like sh*t over this. Then you facebook stalk, dress in black, smoke Cloves, drink Vermouth, and compare EVERYONE to her. But then it’s over, cause sometimes the stitches hurt worse than the cut.

 

1.) BEN FOLDS FIVE – SONG FOR THE DUMPED

It’s over. All of it. The mixed emotions, the weird hobbies, High Fidelity. And yet now it’s only begun. You see her around, remember all the reasons you broke up in the first place, and realize she is the worst! And everything you want to say, everything you’ve told yourself in the shower that you should say, Ben Folds has said it!

 

What songs do you get your getting over on to (cause that’s a sentence). Let me know by tweeting at me @DanBorrelli or in the comments below

 

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