10 Most Annoying Viral Video Songs
Viral videos. We love them, but sometimes they do infect our lives. Like real viruses. Especially ones that include songs. A lot of these I liked when I first heard them, then they quickly turned into the impetus of my near psychotic breaks. I pray that no one ever again finds me soiled in a corner rocking back and forth, while singing 'What, What in the Butt'. Sorry, Nana! Here's a look at 10 viral video songs that have ruined my peaceful existence at one time or another. I apologize in advance for any trauma they may cause you.
Double Take--Hot Problems
This song has been out a week now and already the rage it has induced in me is rotting my already rotting soul to its core. They're kind of like Paris Hilton, without the hot wonkiness and 'singing talent'. And I'm assuming based on their age, without the Valtrex prescription. These girls need to go DIAF, figuratively speaking of course. They have snuffed out the last remaining hope I had for humanity. Less teen girls like this. More like Arya Stark. It's our only hope.
Early 2005...I had a temporary case of Tourette's Syndrome. You don't know humiliation until you realize you've unconsciously been chanting Ma-ia-hii. Ma-ia-huu. Ma-ia-hoo. Ma-ia-haha, while sitting on a prospective jury panel. My brain was in contempt of court.
A rap so lame that I could perform it and regularly did, much to everyone I know's dismay. At first, I was madly in love with Zack's awkward and unjustified confidence. Then I realized that if he and I went to junior high school together he wouldn't have even invited me to his Bar Mitzvah because I was a freak. Let me get this straight, I'm the freak but you're the one who tortures me with questions about my pubic hair growth everyday??? I've already taken this fantasy too far, haven't I?
All Your Base Are Belong To Us
I like memes. I like Engrish. This song makes me feel like I have to run from a gang of homicidal hillbillies. That's a very unpleasant feeling.
The Hamster Dance
I NEVER LIKED THIS SONG. EVER!!! This song is the viral video equivalent of a war crime. I'd rather listen to a whole Nickelback album than hear one second of this aberration.
No one was a bigger advocate of this freaky masterpiece than I. That's why it took me months before I was finally driven crazy by the constant refrain in my head:
mmmm, sweet lemonade
Yeah, sweet lemonade
No one needs that as the soundtrack to their every waking moment. Don't get me started on the horse wankie that haunted my dreams.
What, What In The Butt
Is there a more inappropriate song to inadvertently teach your 3 year old niece to sing? According to my sister-in-law, no. No there is not. In my opinion children should know about not putting things in their butt. Yeah, my sis-in-law didn't buy that excuse either. Can I just plead temporary insanity?
The Gummy Bear Song
Almost 200 million views? HOW? The frog sounds like a 10-pack a day smoker who fell into an auto-tune machine.
Ain't Gonna Pee Pee My Bed Tonight
Is there a more annoying child in existence than this little growling bed pisser? I hate to be mean to a child, but...nevermind. I was about to be mean to a child. I'll just keep my wrong thoughts to myself.
DUH! Of course this song is on the list! I wrote a lot about this song last year for Smosh. It nearly destroyed me listening to it over and over, coming up with new jokes based on the lyrics and video. THIS SONG WAS EVERYTHING TO ME! I'm crying just thinking about that traumatic period, THE BLACKEST TIME OF MY LIFE! See what I do for you guys?
Which viral video song would be playing in your own personal hell? Let me know @desijedeikin or in the comments below!