10 New Fall Shows I Can't Wait To Be Canceled

TV is BACK! YEAH! AMURRCA! I can’t wait for all of my favorite shows to come back. I miss Thursday nights and it’ll be nice to get back to good television. The only problem is so many of these new shows look like crap! So I put together a list of the 10 new fall shows I can’t wait to get canceled.

 

10. Pan Am

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We all like Mad Men, I get it but. But airplanes aren’t sexy, they never will be. Airplanes are crying babies, over priced sandwiches, and a fear of plummeting to your death. Not to mention every time I’m on a plane I’m in cargo shorts and a look disgusting so the last person I want to run into is Christina Ricci. I give this show 6 episodes before ABC pulls the plug.

 

9. Whitney

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Whitney Cummings is hilarious. This show however, looks horrible. Be prepared for a boss coming over for dinner and Whitney having to be in two places at once. This is According to Jim with a female and nobody is buying it. I’m calling 4 episodes before the Cummings gets the yank. .

 

8. The Playboy Club

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Stop it with the almost-Mad Men! The last thing anyone wants is a knock off Don Draper and show who’s main appeal is the objectification of women. Just leave Brittany alone you guys! 1 episode.

 

7. Person Of Interest

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I miss Lost… 142 episodes.

 

6. Free Agents

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Why is Hank Azaria in such good shape? It’s kind of creepy. He’s like 50 and he’s built like LeBron James. Every time I see a commercial for this show it just makes me want to watch Mystery Men. Every comedian has those one or two shows that become hilariously awful references for their mostly solid careers. For Azaria, Free Agents is that show. 9 episodes.

 

5. Charlie’s Angels

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In the 60s they had a tern, jiggle tv. It was used to describe shows like Charlie’s Angels that were nothing more than excuses to watch women bouncing. Well it’s 2011 and we have the internet for that. So there is no longer any reason to sit through a crappy story line littered with campy puns just to see a pretty girl jump up and down. I miss Whitney… 4 episodes.

 

4. Grimm

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When did dark twists on fairytales become a thing? Who green lights these things? “It’s Harry Potter meets Little Red Riding Hood” Amurrca – “That sounds turrable!” Hollywood exec – “AWESOME! HERE’S A BILLION DOLLARS!” CSI Neverland is just one procedural too many. 12 episodes.

 

3. Hart Of Dixie

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This actually sounded like a really cool premise, a fish-out-of-water story about a young NYC doctor who can’t find work so she moves to rural Alabama. Then comes the dialogue. And the fact that Rachel Bilson as a doctor is like casting me as a superhero. She’s talented and all, but a doctor? She’s like, totes miscast y’all!  22 episodes

 

2. Suburgatory

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I don’t even…huh? This trailer had me saying “what” more times than Don Draper. This show makes Keeping up with the Kardashians look thought provoking. There’s something to the idea of a father being afraid that raising his daughter in a city will be bad, only to find out a suburb is way worse. But the execution is weird. It looks more like Desperate Housewives than a smart comedy. Good try but no thanks. 4 episodes.

 

1. Up All Night

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Stop it. Stop it. Cut the crap. Stop wasting Will Arnett’s time and let him do a good show. Stop telling me married people get stressed out. I don’t feel bad for rich white people who have everything. I don’t understand why networks keep making the same type of show when that type of show never works. It’s NBC so I’m going 6970 episodes but still, I miss Suburgatory.

What shows are you least excited for? Let me know in the comments below or by tweeting at me @DanBorrelli

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