5 CRAZY Fan Theories About Spongebob Squarepants

SpongeBob Squarepants is not only one of the most popular cartoons of all time, it has to be one of the strangest concepts to ever be given the greenlight. I mean kudos to the creators for even having the nerve to pitch a cartoon about a sea sponge, much less having it get the thumbs up. But fans aren't just gonna accept that it's nothing but an innocent albeit wacky cartoon!  Here's 5 of the craziest fan theories about SpongeBob Squarepants!

 

Each of the main character represent one of the seven deadly sins

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The Theory: Courtesy of  Bulbagarden.net, The main characters are all actually representations of the Seven Deadly Sins. Patrick: Sloth, Squidward: Wrath, Mr. Krabs: Greed,  Sandy: Pride, Plankton: Envy  Gary: Gluttony and SpongeBob: Lust. 

Why it could be true: Other than the SpongeBob one, these all fit to a T. People have tried explaining the lust one as SpongeBob's lust for life! Um okay. I still like this one, because the other ones are so friggin' awesome. I look forward to the David Fincher directed episode where Pearl's head is discovered in a box. This is going to have a happy ending.

 

It's all about drugs!

spongebob theories drugs

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The Theory: According to SmokeOwT a member of a stoner internet group (duh!), all of the main characters are actually drug addicts. SpongeBob is on meth, Patrick is a stoner (SmokeOwT would know!), Squidward is on heroin, Mr. Krabs is on coke and Sandy Cheeks is an alcoholic because 'she ruins every episode she's in'. I'm just putting out my own theory that SmokeOwT might have some issues he's dealing with based on that last example.

Why it could be true: Okay, I'll bite, this one could work. I would add to this premise that the whole show looks like an acid trip and WHAT IS IN THOSE KRABBY CAKES!?! I guess Mr. Krabs is kind of like the coked-up drug Kingpin, Bikini Bottom's own Scarface? Does this mean in a future episode, SpongeBob will lose all of his dignity and his teeth? Or maybe the creators were just stoned when they came up with it? I never thought someone with the user name SmokeOwT would provide me with so much to ponder.

 

No...It's all about 'inappropriate' things!

spongebob theories sex

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The Theory: This comes to us courtesy of the Conspiracy Theories blog, but if you have a dirty mind, you've probably thought the same thing all ready, SpongeBob is just a bunch of naughty euphemisms rolled up into a children's cartoon. And hey a lot of religious groups have protested the show for 'promoting the gay agenda', so maybe they're onto something? But then again they think that about almost everything.

Why it could be true: A sponge is a contraceptive that catches sperm, SpongeBob is a sponge that catches jellyfish. But WAIT! There's more! Sandy cheeks in Bikini Bottom? Krabs? SpongeBob is an absorbent item in a Bikini Bottom? O.M.G. So millions of kids are snuggling up every night to a glorified tampon?  Well played, SpongeBob creators, well played. As a dirty mind savant, I'm hoping this one is true.

 

The Strange creatures who inhabit Bikini Bottom are the result of nuclear testing

The Theory:  According to Redditor Capmaster:  "The existence of SpongeBob and his strange friends is the result of radiation from nuclear arms testing that was performed on the Bikini Atoll in the late 40's and early 50's."  Whoa. I probably would've done much better in history if my teacher's had used cartoons as teaching tools.

Why it could be true: According to the official Nickelodeon IMDB synopsis of SpongeBob Squarepants,  Bikini Bottom is located underneath the Bikini Atoll. And as the video clip above shows, the area is still prone to mushroom clouds detonations. So yeah, it kind of makes perfect sense. The inhabitants of Bikini Bottom have been exposed to radiation which has turned them into mutant freaks. It's only a matter of time before Pearl rises from the sea and attempts to destroy Tokyo.

 

SpongeBob is actually the most gifted person in the world

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The Theory: Redditor thewhiterabbit1 came up with this one. According to him, "SpongeBob Squarepants is arguably the most gifted, yet underachieving, creature shown on TV".  Okay, thewhiterabbit1, you've got some 'splaining to do!

Why it could be true: Here's some of the evidence that thewhiterabbit1 lays out for us: "In the episode Artist Unknown, he manages (without any formal training) to create what is later evaluated as a brilliant statue. He does this with one stroke of his hand. In Band Geeks he helps teach and pull together Squidward's band overnight. They create a performance so spectacular that it makes Squilliam faint. In just about every endeavor he attempts, he is incredibly successful; he even pioneered several art forms, such as bubble blowing. His only significant problem seems to be an overactive imagination and an undying optimism in others, both of which tend to get him into trouble."   Okay, I'm convinced! I agree with this theory 100%, SpongeBob is an unrecognized prodigy. And I have the authority to confirm this theory in my official capacity as the President of The Gifted Underachiever Society.

 

Do you have any crazy SpongeBob Theories? Tell me what they are @desijedeikin or in the comments below!

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