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6 Very, Very Unique (REAL) Holiday Traditions

Posted By: Francesco Marciuliano on 12.15.11

Red-nosed reindeer. Talking snowman. Cyber Monday. The holidays are full of odd traditions. But some really do stand head and shoulders above the rest.

Caga Tio, The Pooping Log

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What if you like piñatas but wish they involved fire and defecation? Enter Caga Tio, a hollow log with stick legs and a happy little face painted on one end. Each night starting on December 8th, people lovingly give Tio something to “eat” and place a blanket on top of him so he won’t get cold at night. This continues until Christmas Eve, when after days of kindness Caga Tio is then hurled into a burning fireplace and beaten mercilessly with sticks until he poops out candy, fruits and nuts, all as the family sings a happy song. When Caga Tio is finished going number two while engulfed in flames, he excretes one last item, which could be a salt herring or garlic bulb. Then he urinates and dies.

Black Pete. Yes, You Read That Right.

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The Dutch take on Santa Claus differs in a few ways from other traditions. For starters, Santa (“Sinterklaas”) resides not in the frigid North Pole but rather in lovely Spain. Second, instead of flying reindeer Santa arrives by a certainly more believable—though time-consuming—steamship. And last but not least, rather than be surrounded by elves, this Santa is never without his holiday slave, “Black Pete” (“Zwarte Piet”), who hands out cookies to kids when not kidnapping them for being naughty. In recent years attempts have been made to update “Black Pete” by simply saying he looks that way from chimney soot, resulting in a yearly blackface routine that might even make old vaudevillian performers go, “Damn!”

Krampus, Everybody’s Favorite Seasonal Satan

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You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen. But can you recall the most famous demonic holiday beast of all? Meet Krampus, Santa’s “Muscle-for-Hire.” In continuing a seemingly age-old yuletide tradition of child abduction—and allowing Santa to use the old good cop/bad cop routine—Claus hands out gifts to all the nice children while Krampus shoves the naughty ones in a sack and devours them for his Christmas dinner (before berating himself for eating so much during the holidays). Krampus Day is still celebrated on December 5th in Austria, though without the monster’s chains, beating rod and taste for human flesh.

Charlotte’s Web: The Holiday Sequel

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In the Ukraine there is a holiday legend about a window who was too poor to decorate the Christmas tree for her children (retold in the classic stop-motion Christmas TV cartoon, “The Year Without Having to Unsnarl the Tree Lights”). But come Christmas morning the family awoke to find a spider had covered the tree in a beautiful glittering web. Plus, the web turned into silver and gold, making the family rich. And it could power cars, make kids fly and stop aging, though I may be making those last few up. Nowadays people decorate their Christmas trees with fake spider webs and spiders for good luck. And maybe a fake pig under the tree that one of the webs says is “Terrific.”

Because Nothing Says Christmas like KFC

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In Japan Santa has long ago been replaced by another bearded senior citizen, Colonel Sanders. Starting with its first special Christmas meal (chicken and wine) in 1974, KFC has become such an integral part of the holidays that not only must people make reservations for a table weeks in advance but it’s simply not Christmas if you don’t come home with a yuletide bucket of fried chicken, salad and chocolate cake. Rumors that the Three Wise Men bring the Baby Jesus Mashed Potato, Rice and Chicken & Biscuit Bowls have yet to be confirmed.

Decomposed Meat Gifts

In contrast to Japan’s taste for 11 herbs and spices, some citizens of Greenland start their holidays by first killing an auk, a penguin-looking bird that can fly but sadly not fast enough. Then the bird is flayed, wrapped in seal skin (yes, it just keeps getting worse) and buried under a rock in the cold for several months so it properly freeze and rot before being served up on Christmas Day to what may be the most forgiving houseguests in the world.

Which is your favorite strange holiday tradition? Let us know in the comments!

Check Out 6 Most Annoying Holiday Songs!

Tags: black, holiday, log, pete, pooping, satan. santa, traditions, unique

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60 Comments

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Zwoll

11 weeks ago

Rofl! Santa is the American sinterklaas! Sinterklaas isn't the Dutch santa. The name santa Claus is from sinterklaas (;

xXPegasusAngelzXx

14 weeks ago

Holy Craaap :D I think that Krampus (really called Perchtenlauf) pic is in my city!!! Now im proud of havng a pic of my City on Smosh.com :DDD

Drongo

14 weeks ago

in wales they used to knock on your door and sing carrols whilst shaking a horse skull on a stick with bells on it they also demanded to share your christmas dinner so they ate alot of dinner :p

autria

14 weeks ago

"Krampus Day is still celebrated on December 5th in Austria, though without the monster’s chains, beating rod and taste for human flesh."

you have no idea. !!

UsernameLaura

16 weeks ago

Hahah a lot of people are talking about Sinterklaas xD
I think its funny and i get candy and presents.

Madison1313

18 weeks ago

My social studies teacher told us about the Krampus. He even showed us a video that I will never forget even if I have an accident that makes me suffer longterm memory loss.

Krunkenstein

22 weeks ago

Rotten, frozen meat? DELICIOUS!

dowlay

22 weeks ago

to bad america but your santa comes form sinterklaas :D and its not on xmas. and if there was no sinterklaas you didnt get anny presents in xmas. so get your facts! the nederlands FTW!!!!

doomryder

22 weeks ago

youre kinda wrong about sinterklaas,he's not santa,santa also exists here

Danwishfire

22 weeks ago

Sinterklaas <3

iloveharrypotter

22 weeks ago

i wanna see the meat!

Sonic525

22 weeks ago

I think I'm gonna go to Japan for Christmas this year.

geock

22 weeks ago

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Nina.

22 weeks ago

i'm dutch
Sinterklaas is the 6th of december and is a famous tradition that comes from a saint who really exsited in the time slaves where normal.
Thats why we have black pete, he isn't a slave but he is his helper because sinterklaas is old.
He arrives on a ship but contiues on a horse.
We also celebrate xmas like everyone, with santa and stuff
So if you are going to critesize other traditions
i suggest YOU GET YOUR FACTS STRAIT FIRST

RomyVanDerHel

22 weeks ago

Umm.. I dutch and SinterKlaas and Christmas are two different things :/

Oberkiller

22 weeks ago

how is HE gunna get up on a roof, hmmm? The petes are respected by children and even admired, because they are so atheltic. During P.E. at that time of the year (so night of 4 december, 5 december being our saints birthday) kids at school get to get a 'black pete-diploma'. Any child looks forward to Sinterklaas. So for the love of god, we've heard it.

Oberkiller

22 weeks ago

jeez, why is it that EVERY year the dutch holiday 'sinterklaas' is mentioned on some funny website? i live in the Netherlands and know that this tradition is actualy older than your santa Claus tradition with christmas. The only people who find it offending are uptight white people that think they MIGHT offend black people. It really is from the chimney, no child ever questions that here. Not to mention they aren't slaves, they're helpers. Sinterklaas is firetrucking old and rides a horse, how i

nathalielovesnijntje

22 weeks ago

AND IT DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH X-MAS NONONO ITS EVEN ON 5 DEC. AND ITS ABOUT A REALLY RACIST DUTCH HOLYMAN......

nathalielovesnijntje

22 weeks ago

I AM DUTCH AND IT REALY IS REAL ITS AHOLIDAY FOR KIDS HOW DO I KNOW I'M 10 YEARS OLD AND ITS WORLDS MOST RACIST DAY ON EARHTBUT I DID GET A MONSTER HIGH DOLL.

tyuuhghu

22 weeks ago

Merry Christmas ,Christmas top gift

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rejecteddigidestined

22 weeks ago

@Williaene200

Actually, it was a German man who came up with the idea how Santa would look like. If I'm not mistaken, he named him Der Weihnachten Mann. That would translate to 'The Christmas Man.' But I don't think he comes on our Christmas, I think he comes on December 6th.

At least, I think so. c:

tanman173

22 weeks ago

FOLLOW THESE STEPS 1. COVER YOUR MOUTH WITH YOUR HAND 2. WHISPER A WISH INTO YOUR HAND 3. POST THIS ON TO TEN OTHER COMMENTS 4. NOW LOOK AT YOUR HAND

22 weeks ago

At least use the actual sinterklaas (actor Jan Decleir) for a picture because that guy is a dutch imposter :P

Daddy's Girl

22 weeks ago

Wow, alle Nederlanders zijn hier helemaal boos aan het reageren op SinterklaasXD
Zwarte Piet doesn't kidnap children! It is only to scare little children!!

NadiaKomplex

22 weeks ago

I live in austria ;) and i LOVE the krampus day. Of course little kids get scared by the suits xD
But krampus gives me sweets in my boots if i was a bad girl this yearl so fuck yeah. Krampus rules!! xD

Tadzo

22 weeks ago

When I was living in Spain, they would eat a grape every second for 12 seconds leading up to midnight on Xmas Day, which isn't that weird, but I thought it was quite interesting!

Willaene200

22 weeks ago

LoL, Lot of Dutchies here.
But indeed America, you have your Santa because of US.
So be thankful :P

blablamana

22 weeks ago

Sinterklaas is not a substitute for Santa. Sinterklaas is a saint actually. Saint Niklaas to be precise. That's why his hat(Mijter) has a cross on it. Also, black Pete isn't necessarily a slave. In the songs we sing it states that he is black as grim, because he has to go through the chimneys. I agree that this is bullshit, it is a slave. BUT all the kids love this. I loved it too. When he would come in his boat, there would be lines and lines of kids waiting for Sinterklaas. But we also celeb

tryyytr

22 weeks ago

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tryyytr

22 weeks ago

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025Hermosa

23 weeks ago

I noticed Charlotte’s Web: The Holiday Sequel said window than widow... lol. I was just disturbed after reading Decomposed meat gifts. Glad I don't live in Greenland. ;)

Lottedestine

23 weeks ago

In Holland, we calebrate Sinterklaas AND Christmas :D

Darthflippo

23 weeks ago

Funny

ploppertje

23 weeks ago

guys we have in belgium and holland santa and sinterklaas we get presents twice lol !

Jolemieke

23 weeks ago

Aw, c'mon you guys! Sinterklaas is the origin of Santaclaus; Don't you hear it when you pronounce it?
And hey, Zwarte Piet is a cool guy. He always gets in through the chimney ( a true acrobat), that's why he is black.
Sinterklaas is a saint; the Saint Nikolaas. He saved some poor kids from being eaten.

We also celebrate christmas, but not quite with Santa, we just celebrate the birth of Jezus Christ, the accual reason for chirtmas.

veranes

23 weeks ago

first of all... in Holland we have Santa & Sinterklaas..
Sinterklaas is not a version of Santa..
we just have both as a holiday :)

surfer10

23 weeks ago

I kinda celebrate sinterclaas and santa,(mostly santa) and yeah, I know its wierd, but do is a fat old man who rides on a sleigh pulled by magical reindeer to every single house with kids in the world, ceeping into their houses, and delivering presents.

luvstans26

23 weeks ago

eeww last one.

IanasEhtohi

23 weeks ago

Lol, I heard about Black Pete from Chris Kendall (crabstickz).

Rey Sandia

23 weeks ago

I was surprised to find one tradition from my home place (Catalunya, part of Spain) XD. The Caga tio is our substitute, sometimes, for santa claus (yes, whe hit a piece of wood for presents, but believing that a fat guy, enslaver of elfs, from North Pole in one night and with flying reinders gives presents to all people except in Irak... well, not that bad).
Nowadays no one burns the wood, actually, but the tradition is really like this (well, he doesn't die and doesn't piss). But there's anoth

MasterBlackwings

23 weeks ago

and krampus isnt with santa but in most countries you got december 5th right

MasterBlackwings

23 weeks ago

you've made a mistake about krampus (thank you ponychan)
he does not devour childre. he beats them with a multibranch whip then drags them to hell.

Brriiaannn

23 weeks ago

You made some serious mistakes in your text about 'sinterklaas'
For example :
-'sinterklaas' is a made up character for little kids and they celebrate it on the 6th december in belgium and the 5th december in the netherlands
-He's actually born in Turkey and then start living in Spain
- What they do to bad boys is not kidnapping them but hit them with 'de roe', that's actually a torture-tool but ofcourse they dont do that!
-'sinterklaas' was actually called 'sint-nicolas' but little childer

macmckenzie

23 weeks ago

That's right, Saint Nikolaus (as we call him here) has nothing to do with Santa Clause, apart from also wearing red/white clothes and having a long white beard. You're right about the good cop/bad cop thing though, that's the idea behind it. :)
And not all Perchten runners are violent, some are quite nice, the problem is that their costumes are very heavy and the can hardly see through the masks, so they often more accidentally knock someone over. Of course there are also some jerks amongst the

Yourgrandma

23 weeks ago

Sineterlaas isn't santa but saint Nicolas i think and we have also à christmas but not like a santa with reindeers or something only a christmas3 and sinterklaas is earlier
i'm only 13 so sorry if my english is bad ;D

toldasor

23 weeks ago

too bad america, but actually, the Dutch sinterklaas is the original :P

House196

23 weeks ago

You got a few things wrong about Krampus... he is the helper of saint Nicholas (not Santa) who is celebrated on December 6th... he doesn't eat bad children he just scares them so that they behave... and it isn't celebrated just in Austria... we have it here in Croatia too and in many other Catholic countries as welll

roverrobert

23 weeks ago

Finally they've put an tradition from my country on the smosh pit yes
Ps: if i spell this wrong then thats because i am from the netherlands and 13

melovescookies

23 weeks ago

Yeah, sinterklaas is awesome, in The Netherlands (that's where I live... XD) sinterklaas is celebrated on the 5 th of December,(in belgium on the 6th) but we do have santa claus too!