7 People Harry Potter Should Have Recruited For The Wizarding War

When he lead an attack on Hogwarts, Voldemort's armies consisted of trolls, giants, OTHER MONSTERS AND STUFF. And what forces did Harry Potter respond with? His teachers and friends from school. Maybe instead of wandering around in the woods for straight-up a year Harry should have done a little outreach. Here are some individuals who would have made an impact in the Battle of Hogwarts. And don't worry if they're from different fictional worlds than Harry Potter. He probably has a spell to allow him to cross universes and talk to them. Remember, he's magic.

 

Sagat

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There is no one better to have on your side than Sagat, for three reasons:

ONE. Can block Avada Kedavras by holding back.

TWO. TIger Uppercut!

THREE. Sweet eyepatch looks tight.

 

Jafar (Genie Version)

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For Jafar (Genie Version), the whole point of turning into a genie was to be the most powerful being in the universe. When hearing that Voldemort has laid claim to that title, there is no way Jafar (Genie Version) wouldn't use his phenomenal cosmic powers to strike him down. Of course, then Harry Potter would have to defeat Jafar (Genie Version), but how hard could that be? Aladdin did it, and he didn't even know how to Expelliarmus.

 

General David Petreus

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That's right, the general who orchestrated the highly successful surge of troops in Iraq. Compared to the Iraqi insurgents, the Death Eaters look like a bunch of middle schoolers playing Ben 10 in their front yard.

 

Eminem

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Have you ever seen 8 Mile? Me either, but he seems really tough and confident in his hit single from the film "Lose Yourself".

 

Iron Man

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Despite this being a magic battle, we must never forget that Iron Man can fly and shoot missles. Who has ever not wanted that on their side? I don't care if you're playing touch football, your first choice should always be the guy who can fly and shoot missles.

 

Chris Redfield

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Being just a regular white dude, Chris Redfield has killed a lot more monsters than he has any right to. I mean, remember that El Gigante from Resident Evil 5? Anyone who's ever watched an MMA match knows that Redfield should have gone down in the first. Somehow, he keeps racking up these victories, and why not get that momentum on your side? And when that momentum eventually runs out, Harry Potter doesn't have to feel guilty, because that idiot should have used an ink ribbon before going into battle.

 

Hitch

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If Hitch can convince perpetual schlub Kevin James to talk to a hot lady, imagine what he can do for everyone on the front lines! "Yo Kingsley Shacklebolt, we GOTTA get you outta these robes dawg! You look like you from Pottery Barn! Man lookatchu!"

Who do you think would be a difference-maker in the greatest wizarding battle of all time? Post your draft picks in the comments!

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