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7 Ways to Ruin Thanksgiving for Everyone

Posted By: Darlene Amidon-Brent on 11.25.10

Thanksgiving: that time-honored American tradition when we gather with relatives we barely know, gorge ourselves on a little bit of meat and a lot of carbs, and argue about politics and religion. The holiday is stressful enough, so try to avoid doing any of the following, or you just might have a familial disaster of epic proportions on your hands.

1. Make Your Guests Wear Ridiculous Holiday-Themed Hats

This one seems harmless, but making folks wear a goofy turkey headdress really sets the stage for a day full of humiliation and awkward moments.

2. Two Words: “Roasted Baby”

Guaranteed to leave a bad taste in everyone’s mouth.

3. Bring the Soup Kitchen to Your Kitchen

He might be the nicest guy living under the freeway overpass but he's also kind of a bummer to be around... always complaining... plus his beard smells like a can of expired Spam.

4. Invite an Alleged Murderer to Your Family Dinner

Even if he’s innocent, his presence is sure to make everyone uneasy. On the plus side: If he’s guilty, I’d bet he can carve a mean ham.

5. Stage a Hip-hop Reenactment of the First Thanksgiving

Be sure to give this guy the lead role.

6. Have a Pre-dinner Viewing of PETA’s Video Detailing Animal Abuse at the Turkey Slaughterhouse

There’s no better way to lift spirits, whet appetites, and instill a sense of thankfulness in folks than by showing them footage of their main course being stomped on, slammed against walls, and boiled alive. Bon appétit!

7. Introduce a New Family Tradition: The Clothing-Optional Thanksgiving Dinner

Let’s face it. Nobody wants to see Grandpa’s giblets... except for maybe Grandpa.

Have any Thanksgiving horror stories you want to share with us?

Check Out A Smosh Thanksgiving Cartoon!

Tags: 7, everyone, family, holiday, ruin, Thanksgiving, ways

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26 Comments

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livlovej

24 weeks ago

I am a vegitarion, so the meat pic was really mean and gross

dalia44

25 weeks ago

I LOVE MEAT!!!!!!!!!!! If meat didn't exist, neither would I. I need meat!

mp3me14

70 weeks ago

NOCIYF!!!! and vegetarians rock!

semkok

71 weeks ago

I don't get the point of vegatarians... If you have carnivorous teeth, use it. -.-
Yes, you can stop eating endangered spieces (whoever does that) but that doesn't mean you have to be a vegan...

muzik mann

74 weeks ago

candy

DanJammin

77 weeks ago

PETA is some hypocritical candy. i know, because i use to be a vegetarian and was totally against it. and @rmxpokemon....humane societys don't kill animals, they euthanize them....for dumb reasons, tha

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78 weeks ago

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rmxpokeman

78 weeks ago

PETA is so full of candy. They kill more animals than the humane society.

surtor

78 weeks ago

omg i just got back from our thanksgiving dinner and oh they broke rule number 1... we all had to wear colorful paper crowns for over 3 hours.. yes.. all of us.. even 89 year old gramps

pixiedust357

78 weeks ago

that homeless dudes beard makes me think of pirates of the caribbean

u r stupid

78 weeks ago

at least they didn't show his nuts

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78 weeks ago

#7 is so gross! the men r probably diggin the woman tho!

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78 weeks ago

One time my dad was joking around with my uncle, and my uncle pulled out a butter knife like a mugger would. my dad pulled out his military grade pocket knife. my grandma yelled at both of them