8 Weird (REAL) June Holidays

There are some really important holidays in June. For instance June is LGBT pride month, all month long we celebrate the struggle queer culture has had to go through to get rights and respect in the United States. But there are plenty of holidays in the month of June that very few people have heard of, and even less can believe.

 

Applesauce Cake Day - June 7th

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It's the one day a year where everybody's supposed to eat something called Applesauce cake. What is applesauce cake, you ask? Hell, your guess is as good as mine! It sounds pretty rad though.

 

National Accordion Awareness Month

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I don't need an accordion awareness month, because I try to be aware of accordions all year long. But some people are not nearly as diligent as I am about remembering accordions exist. This month is for them.

 

National Acne Awareness Month

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Are you tired of not remembering you have acne? Would you like an entire month dedicated to constantly reminding you you have mountains of greasy pus and dirt clogging up your pores? Then June is the month for you.

 

National Hollerin' Contest Day - June 18th

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On National Hollerrin' Contest Day people from all over the country are supposed to travel to the remote township of Spivey’s Corner, North Carolina and participate in a counties to see who can holler the loudest. Not participating in this holiday is, of course, punishable by death.

 

Potty Training Awareness Month

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Remembering to get your babies to learn how to crap in the right place in the month of June. June is not only the only month that celebrates being aware of teaching your baby to go to the bathroom in the right place, it's also the month where you're legally allowed to do so.

 

National Catfish Day - June 25th

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I know this sounds like the day where everyone's supposed to celebrate the existence of catfish, but it's actually the day when a secret cadre of warriors wades into the Pacific Ocean each year to bring a sacrifice to the 150 foot tall catfish who determines whether our crops will come in the next year. If the catfish is pleased with the sacrifice he blesses the United States with good crops, if he is stands on his hind legs and storms across the U.S., crushing everything in his way.

 

National Internet Safety Awareness Month

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This is the month where we celebrate not getting molested by sexual predators online. If you've ever not been molested by a sexual predator online this is your special month!

 

Insurance Awareness Day - June 28th

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This is a stupid nonsense holiday created by insurance companies to trick us into buying insurance. Never celebrate this holiday. Nothing's fun about setting aside a day to think about buying more insurance.

 

What are some holidays you wish existed? Let us know in the comments!

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