The 9 Most Disturbing Types Of Justin Bieber Fans
Aren't all Justin Bieber fans disturbing, you may be asking yourself? And yes, you would be correct in that assumption. But some people just like bad music....what are you gonna do? And I think we can all forgive the lapsed judgment of a tween girl in the midst of a hormonal overload. I mean, they wanna kiss boys, yet at the same time they're scared of teen boys. Therefore they crush hard on the most non-threatening boy in the world right now. He is so non-threatening that when described as a boy, the word boy is usually always accompanied with sarcastic air quotes. That I can understand. And then there's these people. Here's a look at the 8 most disturbing types of Justin Bieber fans.
What is up with all these older broads who wanna get their hands on Bieber's virginity? Or I guess now it might be his born-again virginity. Are these old beliebers just your standard cougar on the prowl or are they actually older broads trying to jump on the bisexual bandwagon? The jury is still out on this one.
Guys Who Think He's A Hot Chick
Fine. I'll go a long with the fact that you actually think he's a hot chick, but there's still the pesky part about his music blowing. Get your mind out of the gutter.
I mean seriously, you're only a 'fan' because he helps you score cheap laughs! What kind of lives have you chosen for yourselves? Spending hours of your time coming up with new ways of saying Justin Bieber is a girl and has no penis is a waste of whatever little talent you may possess. Welcome to my daily interior monologue. Crap, I've got like maybe six more of those type jokes to make.
Dads Trying To Rebuild Relationships With Their Estranged Teen Daughters
Any girl who would forgive a man for abandoning her as a baby just because he shows up with two scalped tickets to a Bieber concert and the MOST PATHETIC vanity plates of all time doesn't deserve a father.
It takes a hardcore gangster to hang a Bieber poster in his crib. He's just daring you to make a joke about it. And when you do he'll pull a gun out of his SpongeBob backpack and pop a cap in your ass. Then he'll cry and rock as he hugs his lady bug Pillow Pet while "One Less Lonely Girl" plays softly in the background. Cause that's how he rolls!
So uncool he's cool again, I get it! This is why we all hate you and your stupid ironic ways.
People Who Love Beliebers
Normally, there's nothing I like about pedophiles. But I have to give them props for at least not being into the Biebs for the music.
Girls Who Need Therapy
This type includes anyone who has ever photoshopped themselves in a photo with Bieber, written erotic Bieber fan fiction or TOLD THE WORLD THAT THEY GAVE UP 30 SECONDS OF THEIR LIFE SO BIEBER COULD IMPREGNATE THEM. I don't know if the Bieber Love child thing is more embarrassing if it's true or false. But I'm giving a slight edge to true.
Girls Who REALLY Need Therapy
If you have ever threatened to kill someone to defend Bieber's honor, I have one thing to say to you. YOU DON"T REALLY KNOW HIM! And besides, we all know you're just jealous that you didn't think of pulling a Mariah Yeater first.
And because it's HIGH-larious....
Which type of Bieber fan do you hate the most? Let me know @desijedeikin or in the comments below!