Awesome Japanese Winter Traditions

Winter in Japan. In ancient Japan this would be the time when Sailor Moon fought the nefarious Frieza for control of the country's vast army of Macross Mechs. Though that tradition has fallen by the wayside, there are still a wealth of traditional celebrations and ways to celebrate in Japan.

 

Japanese New Years

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Japanese New Year is the mostly widely celebrated holiday in Japan. So how does an entire country famed for exporting the most over the top cultural items in all of history rock in the new years? The country that invented candy that makes your breasts bigger? They celebrate by cleaning their houses, preparing various foods for their families and staying inside on new years night to eat a quiet meal in front of the TV. I guess it makes sense that they take a break on New Years, considering that the rest of the year they're dressing stray cats in used school girl panties and saving Neo Tokyo from giant sentient spiders with metal legs.

 

Coming Of Age Day (Exactly As Hot As It Sounds)

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Begun in 714 A.D. after a young prince changed his hair to signify the adult, Coming Of Age Day wins the award for least interesting history of a holiday in Japan. And, unlike Coming Of Age Day in France- wherein everyone who has just turned twenty has to mud wrestle- or Coming Of Age Day in Brazil- where 20 year olds notice it's Coming Of Age Day, shrug, then immediately go back to making out with each other in front of a pack of shrieking Macaws- Coming Of Age Day is celebrated by having all the 20 year olds in a prefecture go to the government office and listen to a boring speech and then get a bullsh*t gift from a government official. Hey, way to have winter fun, Japan.

 

Eating As Much KFC As You Can Get Your Japanese Hands On

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Begun when KFC tricked the Japanese populace into thinking eating KFC was a good thing in 1974, it has since become extraordinarily popular in Japan to order as much KFC as they can stand on Christmas Eve and eat said filthy chicken. Colonel Sanders is the closest Japan has to a Santa Claus, which in a sense is a better move than Santa, as Colonel Sanders is so continuously slathered in chicken grease he'd have a very easy time getting down chimneys. 

 

Do Not Send Red Christmas Cards

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Red cards in Japan are sent to indicate funerals. So it's a real dick move to send a funeral colored card on Christmas. Armed with this knowledge, you might think it would be really funny to send a Japanese man dozens of red cards on Christmas Day, and you would be right.

 

The Sonic Destruction Of The 108 Sins

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Take that, sin.

 

According to Buddhist tradition there are 108 "troublesome desires"  that man is subject to. The only way to defeat these desires is by ringing a giant bell 108 times on New Years Eve. If some of you are going, "That doesn't make any sense, Buddhism's weird," be sure to check out this passage from the bible before you cast the first stone: "...Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up the road, some youths came from the city and mocked him, and said to him, “Go up, you baldhead! Go up, you baldhead!” So he turned around and looked at them, and pronounced a curse on them in the name of the LORD. And two female bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths."

 

 

What other holiday traditions in Japan are rad? How many bears would you have the Lord send after people who made fun of you? Let us know in the comments!

 

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