Bad Ways To Get Your Teacher To Like You
Teachers can be pretty jaded about students. They make almost no money. They work long hours. So it takes a lot to stand out and get a teacher to like you. Here are some of the best ways
Teachers love a little eye candy.
Buy Them Something Nice
Everyone loves a gift, and teachers are no exception. Gifts teachers tend to prefer include apples, help paying off their student loans, and a new job.
Make Fun Of The Other Subjects
Teachers are very competitive with each other over who teachers the best subject. So in your chemistry class make fun of math class, in your english class make fun of civics, if you're in P.E.... don't worry about making fun of other classes, just pat your p.e. teacher on the back and say it's OK well they curl into the fetal position and repeat to themselves over and over again, "I can't believe this is my life."
Fire A Bow And Arrow At Them
Teachers get bored really easy, because they are teaching the same thing all day. So they appreciate a little danger thrown into the mix, shakes up their day, perks them up better than coffee. (Editor note: DON'T DO THIS HOLY CRAP DON'T PLEASE)
Hide Al Qaeda Brochures In Their Purse And Then Call The FBI On Them
Teachers pretty much universally love being picked up in an unmarked government van and detained indefinitely without having been read their miranda rights or being given access to a lawyer.
Be A Quiet, Attentive Student
Sit up straight, listen, study, and try your best. Every teacher loves a student who clearly cares about learning and respects them.
Hurl A Live Wolf At Them, Preferably Half-Starved
The profession of teaching originally had nothing to do with education. "Teachers" as they were originally defined in Anglo-Saxon Medieval England were employed by the King to stand near him all the time in case he felt like picking up and throwing a wolf at someone. It was believed that the hungriness of the wolf correlated directly how much the "Teacher" was valued by the King. By throwing a hungry wolf at your teacher your are showing them you know your history, and teachers love a student who knows their history.
What else can you do to get a teacher to like you? Let us know in the comments!