Bieber Invited To Do Paternity Test On The Maury Show!
We already know that Justin has said he will be taking a paternity test in two weeks. Now Maury Povich has offered to let The Biebs reveal the results on his show! I feel like someone went into my head and stole my dreams and is trying to make them into reality. Thank you, shameless Maury show producers!! I feel like I'm getting to 'Make-a-Wish' without having to face a devastating illness.
A Povich spokesperson has said that they are actively pursuing the singer. Justin needs to get on board! In my opinion there is only one way to prove paternity. You need to get your fool ass on the Maury show. It is THE place to go for paternity disputes. Screw the courts! Wouldn't you die to see Bieber's caption?? JUSTIN: Says He's Not The Father Because The Sex Only Lasted 30 Seconds. I live for Maury captions. Don't these guys know how ridiculous their excuses look in a pithy little sentence under their guilt-a** faces?
In my dream Selena is also there, holding Justin's hand despite rumors that the couple have ended their relationship. OH! And she is also five months pregnant with his child. OH! OH! And she pulls off Mariah's weave the moment she walks out onto the stage. A girl can dream, can't she?
Sadly, I know this GIF is the closest we will come to seeing Bieber on the Maury show.
Alas, we're more likely to see Justin as the opening act at the Gathering of Juggalos than we are to see him in a baby mama drama on the Maury show. So we'll just have to wait for the paternity results, which will probably be revealed in a boring press release, no angry baby mama tears, no hot girl cat fight. YAWN. Does Justin have any words of wisdom to get us through these troubling times? Why, yes. Yes, he does.
Let's judge him on the music, you guys! Uhhhh, thanks but that's pretty much what I've already been doing, you clueless girl-looking thing.
What do you think? Would you watch Bieber on Maury? Let me know @desijedeikin or in the comments below!