'Black Ops' Sets World Record For Best Video Game Ending?!
The world's foremost authority on measuring finger nail length, Guinness, has announced that, after polling 13,00 "gaming fans", Call of Duty Black Ops will hold the world record for the best video game ending of all time. I went and watched it for myself and it was... all right. Maybe it isn't fair for me to judge, as I haven't played through Black Ops and therefore don't know the context, but it doesn't seem like the ending is anything more than a bad guy getting choked with the left and right analogue sticks, some swimming, and some people standing on a boat celebrating their country.
The theme of the game seems to be that AMERICA RULES due to its' helicopters and its' hope.
The list of top fifty games endings can be found here, and let me tell you, there are some weird inclusions, including New Super Mario Bros. Wii at number 40. Yes, saving the princess is considered the 40th best ending of all time. New Super Mario Bros. Wii is a game whose ending you could guess if you had the pattern-recognition skills of a guy who didn't wear a helmet in a motorcycle crash.
Spoiler alert! (for idiots)
Now, I'm trying really hard not to be angry about this. We all have different tastes, and Call of Duty just isn't for me. But I've seen enough sitcom episodes where somebody sits on a flagpole longer than anyone else or bakes the world's biggest calzone to know that the Book of World Records has is important.
Would Fonzie have helped his cousin Angie Fonzerelli break a world record if it wasn't going to bring out his natural Fonzerelli confidence?
But handing out Word Records for Best Subjective Thing isn't for Guinness. They handle world records. You can objectively determine how long Bobby and Cindy Brady were on a see-saw — you cannot objectively state Call of Duty's quality. I don't like this recognition being bestowed upon Call of Duty not because I hate the game but because I love world records. Once people are allowed to vote, world records become a popularity contest instead of a pure, objective declaration of greatness. And it unfairly calls into question those who are unequivocally the best in the world.
Are these actually the World's Fattest Twins, or were they voted World's Fattest Twins by 13,000 fat twins?
Since it isn't possible to objectively name the best video game ending of all time, let's talk about our personal favorites in the comments below!