Breaking and Entering, and Other Inappropriate After-School Activities with Laura
More inspirational writing from our darling correspondent, Laura!
The other day, while my neighbor Derrick was at work, I went into his house through the doggie door. He would be fine with me doing this, if he knew me, because sometimes, late at night I see small people going in and out through that thing and I am, after all, kind of small.
Anyway, I went through his things and found the neatest stuff in the drawer of his nightstand.
I am going to have a really good time at the rec center this afternoon!
Cashish! This is always useful.
I think I could buy ice cream for everyone with all this green.
Speaking of green. This is a funny smelling spice.
Maybe we can sprinkle it on our ice cream?
Someone’s not taking the bus today!
Billy better not f*&k with you know who or I’m gonna cuff his ass to the rail on the ramp for handicapped people.
In case me, Steph and Doris need to leave the country in a hurry.
If we travel overseas, we can use this to tape the money to our bodies.
The Treasury Dept. doesn’t like you to take more than ten grand out of the country at once.
This is for Bobby Douglas.
He is very opinionated and likes to advocate untenable positions.
I don’t know what kind of futuristic weaponry this is -- I can't get the raygun to fire right.
But I guess I could bonk someone in the head with it.
Now this is speaking my language -- 9mm of cold double-fired black steel. But I like to follow the rules. No guns at the rec center.
I am leaving this at home. Plus it would never get past those diligent TSA workers at the airport.
I am giving this to my mom. She farts up a storm.
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47 Comments
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gamegirl0
30 weeks ago
I don't know how to tell you this but i think your neighbor's a pedo(bear?) lol XD
Ohernandez
38 weeks ago
the neighbor is probably a transexual
YummyYummyInMyTummy3
51 weeks ago
thats such a fancy dildo!
nataliakhairi
61 weeks ago
dildo + vibrator = AWESOMENESS :D
0O00O00O0
77 weeks ago
its a vibrator randomcheese..
randomcheese
77 weeks ago
#8 looks like a dildo
bone249
78 weeks ago
@ AMAZINGDOG its a vibrater
****S*H*I*N*Y****
81 weeks ago
And the 'beano' thing made me laugh 'cause over here (England) it's the name of a kid's comic :P
****S*H*I*N*Y****
81 weeks ago
Umm you could definitely bonk with that thing, in a manner of speaking
zenman
82 weeks ago
laura has a freakin wierd perv neighbor
pixpumira
90 weeks ago
nah you can't buy ice cream for everyone .. i'll eat it all :)
jigman3
91 weeks ago
haha, the vibrator
Drunkenfox
94 weeks ago
u can try with my weapon the raygun is very acurate (insert pedobear here)
smoshman30
96 weeks ago
wtf is with that dildo?!!?
supertoria12
97 weeks ago
the beano is the icing on the cake. haha love it!
x-tra-phresh
98 weeks ago
i'm gonna cry...
sta539
99 weeks ago
maybe the little people were aliens and they left there raygun! ofcourse!LOL XD!
TheWILLofDC
99 weeks ago
lol is that a real cover of the advocate
killmeiamcgyver
99 weeks ago
is the 3rd last a dick?
sarahjiffy
99 weeks ago
Beano has now been ruined for me. Over here it's a comic, but I guess it's medicine.
A-Dizzle
99 weeks ago
aDinoAteMyCupcake has pointed out one of the great mysteries of our time. maybe only god truly understands the relationship between rayguns and weed.
iPwnage
99 weeks ago
where do you get beano
ADinoAteMyCupcake
99 weeks ago
Why is it that "rayguns" and weed are always found together? O_o
Barracuda
99 weeks ago
I love Laura :)
danineteen
99 weeks ago
That raygun looks purple, not pink, to me.
hinoki
99 weeks ago
Oh my. Derrick seems like a decently reliable person when it comes to shopping for rayguns...
eddie240
99 weeks ago
lol dildo! i want one!!
iLoveSmosh97
99 weeks ago
its a pink dildo hehe ;) ;) ;)
KatAttackx
99 weeks ago
Lmao. Anthony, your comment just proved, once again, why I love you guys. xD
A-Dizzle
99 weeks ago
Thanks, Simon99 for telling us what that thing is. We don't have any personal experience with such things and appreciate your enlightening us.
ally7114812
99 weeks ago
lolz the last one
Mikaykaymeep
99 weeks ago
"I can't get the raygun to fire right."
AHAHAHA
ElinIvarson
99 weeks ago
Ok, innapropiate dildo....
ItsBrittneyL
99 weeks ago
lol
smoshman56
99 weeks ago
I had to stare at the dildo for a good minute...
gfshils1995
99 weeks ago
haha nice
simon99
99 weeks ago
why are you showing us a dildo? just asking