8 Controversial Flavors of Candy Everyone Has Opinions About
There are a lot of things that divide us as humans — religion, politics, favorite Gilmore Girls boyfriend arc, and so on. But one thing that shouldn’t be a source of violent dispute between you and your loved ones is the flavor of candy. And yet, people have such volatile opinions about their sweets that it can often turn their personal relationships... sour (DO YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE?). Here are the most controversial flavors of candy that you should stray away from mentioning when at a fancy dinner party or meeting your significant other’s parents for the first time.
Pink and Yellow Starbursts
This is the big one. This is the Civil War of candy disputes. And I don’t mean the U.S. Civil War. I mean Marvel’s Civil War.
Some might argue that all M&M colors taste the same. Those are the Switzerland of people — they take a stance of neutrality (but are secretly hiding gold for people who love the green M&Ms best).
Girl Scout Cookies
Don’t believe that this is a big controversial flavor dispute? Okay, first make sure that the wall closest to you is only drywall and not concrete. Okay, now imagine having someone tell you they are going to buy Girl Scout Cookies, only to come back with six boxes of Rah-Rah Raisins. Calm down — it was only an hypothetical, but punching a hole in that wall was, in fact, the correct response. The truth is you care about this way more than you thought you did.
Cotton Candy is about as close to eating a cup of pure sugar you can get away with while being in a public space, and it's apparently not for everyone. Some people straight up hate the stuff, but what's also a weird point of contention is the color preference of cotton candy. Some say blue, others say pink, others say "Help, I’m going into a diabetic coma." There is really no pleasing everyone.
Perhaps no other singular confection inspires as much hate as candy corn. No one really even ever comes to its defense. Instead, supporters of the corn gather in secret moonlit coven meetings each October to whisper to each other "Actually, I don’t think candy corn is that bad" and "Yeah, I kinda like it" and "Those pumpkins are good too" and "Oh yeah I like the pumpkins". Every year, angry mobs catch at least one of these groups of fiends and burn them at the stake.
Whoppers are often cited as one of the most hated candies in America, which may come as a surprise to anyone born in the '50s who used to frequent soda fountains and enjoy chocolate malts. But a lot of people who don’t have that particular experience have been very vocal about the textural similarities between Whoppers and styrofoam packing peanuts.
Is banana-flavored candy good? Please fight over this in the comments below for my amusement.
Dads and grandfathers across the world must unite to keep the black licorice industry going. There's no other explanation for it. I have literally never seen anyone who isn’t a 40-plus year-old male be like "black licorice for me, please!" Black licorice is like if someone got notes back on candy, like, "So we love everything you've done here, except one minor change — if you could have the taste be the opposite of what it is right now that would be great" and the candy-maker was like, "It's supposed to be sweet and delicious" and the note-givers were like, "We see where you’re coming from, and really want to compromise on this, but just like what if, instead of sweet and delicious you made candy bitter and terrible?" and the candy maker was like, "That sounds awful" and the note-givers were like "Look, we are dads. Just do it because we said so." And that’s how black licorice came into existence.
Know of other flavors of candy people have absurdly strong opinions about? Tell me your own on Twitter or in the comments below!