Drunk Miley Cyrus Eats Boyfriend's Penis Cake
Miley Cyrus can't be tamed, y'all! First she made headlines this week, for going braless in West Hollywood. Slow news week, I guess.
Now she's making news for presenting her boyfriend, Hunger Games star Liam Hemsworth, with a big ol' penis cake for his birthday. Apparently, Miley loves penis cake, like a fat kid loves cake because it wasn't long before she posed with it it all seductive-like. There are a ton of pics of her on the internet pretending to gobble up the chocolate wang, but unfortunately they are WAY too pornographic. I know, right? She's come a long way from Hannah Montana to Penis Cake Slamma. Here's a pic of the action censored to keep your thoughts semi-pure.
Reports are that Miley was loaded at Liam's party. WHA?? But she's only 19 and the legal drinking age is 21....I'm confused? Isn't she a role model? So you're telling me that in addition to acting like a ho, she's also criminal under-age drinker? SMH.
That's probably why after acting all sexy time with the cake, she approached it psychopathically with a knife and then mushed faces with BF Liam. She like practically ate his face off, y'all. She played Hunger Games with his tongue. Then if I know Miley, she had a big slice of chocolate balls and washed it all down with an ice cold glass of milk. Mmmm. Now I've totally got a hankering for some cake. Cake-shaped cake.
I'm no expert in psychology, but I think Miley is craving attention. Cause she hasn't looked this desperate for the spotlight, since those 'candid' photos of her leaked. You know the ones where she was lounging around on her satin sheet, with full hair and make-up and wearing sexy lingerie? Totes casual-like?
I would just die if these photos of me texting were released on the internets! Is my lighting okay?
What do you think of Miley's antics? Is she out of control? Let me know @desijedeikin or in the comments below!