Dumb Products The Jersey Shore Cast Should Endorse

The Jersey Shore cast is everywhere these days promoting some crazy product or another, water, condoms, work out DVDs... You literally can’t turn on the TV without seeing them at a red carpet event or in a commercial with Justin Bieber. Most of the roommates have turned their overnight fame into money in the bank (The Situation reportedly made $5 million bucks last year!) by writing best-selling books, making club appearances or even hawking supplements. Whatever they’re promoting, it pays to party at the shore. Here are some products I’d LOVE to see them endorse.

 

Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi - 4 Loko

Who better to hock a product that will make you a black-out drunk, than America's favorite little black-out drinker!

 

Vinny Guadagnino - Plungers

Poor Vinny always seems to be the one stuck unclogging the toilet! He loves getting into someone elses poop. Gross! But I think unclogging your own sh*tty situation using Vinny's own special line of plungers wouldn't be such a stinky idea!

 

Jenni “JWoww” Farley - Shamwow!

It only makes sense that JWoww would use that rockin' bod to sell her own special line of the ShamWow!

 

Ronnie Ortiz-Magro and Sammi “Sweetheart” Giancola - The Open Hearts Necklace

When you fight this much you need to keep your heart open... to other possibilities... other hot chicks and other guido dudes who might come along. The Open Hearts Necklace is perfect for these two!

 

Deena Cortese - Carnival Holiday Cruises

The newest cast member describes herself as a “Holiday,” so we’d love to see be the new spokes person for Carnival Holiday Cruises! Where else can you hang out with a reality tv has-never-been, get groped by a Karaoke DJ, be slipped a roofie by a vacationing frat boy, and possibly catch Hep C? On Deen's "I'm a Holiday" Carnival Holiday Cruise ship, of course!

 

DJ “Pauly D” DelVecchio - Miracle-Ear

We’re surprised Miracle-Ear isn't beating down Pauly D’s door to get him to sell their products. He’s always shouting, “cabs are here” and alerting the housemates when a grenade is in the house. He clearly has some kind of hearing problem. They get him one of these suckers and he'll be quite as a church mouse.

 

Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino - The Shakeweight For Men

After a few workouts with the Shakeweight for Men he's gonna have a six-pack ON HIS ARMS!

What other products would the Jersey Shore cast members be perfect at selling? Let us know in the comments below!

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