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Facebook Knows If You're A Drunk???

Posted By: Desi Jedeikin on 10.05.11

Are you concerned that someone you know may have a drinking problem? Check out their Facebook profile! According to a new study, Facebook can be used as a diagnostic tool in determining whether or not someone may have alcohol issues. I'll be right back, I have to detonate an atomic bomb in my timeline.

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Researchers from the University of Washington and the University of Wisconsin examined the Facebook profiles of 300 college students and then categorized them into three groups: ones with no alcohol references, references to alcohol but not considered problem drinking, and then ones that pretty much talk about getting wasted constantly. The scientists awarded bonus drunk points if the student had a marker fail profile pic. JK.

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Once the researchers categorized the students based on their Facebook profiles, they had the students take an AUDIT (Alcohol Use Disorders Identification Test), a diagnostic tool that is commonly used to determine problem drinking. And surprise, surprise, the ones who constantly talked about getting wasted also showed higher risk for alcohol abuse on their AUDITs. Yup. Money was just spent to determine that people who appear like drunks on Facebook are also drunks IRL. I give up.

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The biggest red flag I see with the study is that it seems to suggest that Facebook can be used as a diagnostic tool. Even going so far to suggest that Dorm RA's can use what they see on Facebook to approach students whom they believe may have a drinking problem. Welcome to your full time job, RA's.

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And you know the privacy police will be all over using people's PRIVATE Facebook activity to make any determinations about them. Facebook is PRIVATE, people! Hello? It has a section called privacy settings. Yeah, only a drunk would assume that he has some semblance of privacy on Facebook.

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So carry on, drunks! Keep on posting pictures of yourself in urine-soaked pants on St. Paddy's Day. No one's paying attention. Facebook is private. Plus, I would seriously be bummed if you got a clue. I like waking up the day after one of your benders and deciphering the leftovers of your drunk-booking while I enjoy my morning coffee. It's like my favorite newspaper.