First World Problems of Batman Villains!
If I were going to a party with a bunch of Batman villains, there's really only one thing I'd expect them to complain about — the fact that they're beaten up daily by the Batman. But when I was invited to The Riddler's Game of Thrones season premiere party the other night, I discovered that they actually complain about a lot of other stupid garbage. Presented here now are the most egregious first world problems of Batman villains.
The criminal underworld won't leave Bane alone, always pestering him to break their buddies' back, their girlfriend's backs, even their own back, just so they can say they had their backs broken by the same man who broke Batman's back. With breaking backs becoming so routine, Bane is worried he'll lose his love of breaking backs.
Another tax hike at the Penguin Lounge? It's like President Obama doesn't even care about small (corrupt) businesses.
Ever since his transformation into the grotesque monster Man-Bat, Doctor Kurt Langstrom has been denied entry to his country club even though he remains up to date on his dues. Really pretentious, Gotham City Country Club — you eat the brains and eyes of a few policemen and suddenly you're not allowed to play croquet?
Clayface tried to make his own Chipotle burritos at home, and they weren't as good as the ones at the restaurant!
Oh, you turned to a life of crime after being ruthlessly mocked in a carnival sideshow? A lot of us would kill to have a job in this economy.
The Joker is still worried that Community might be cancelled by NBC. In fact, The Joker has gone so far as to release a video declaring that for every day Community isn't renewed by NBC, someone will die. He's a man of his word. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Harvey Dent was also denied access to the Gotham City Country Club, since half of his face is a melted teal color, and the club is strictly whites only.
Which Batman villain is doing the most complaining about nothin'? Let me know on twitter @mikeyfromsu or in the comments below!