Google Reveals 'Project Glass' Augmented Reality Glasses!

Hey, were you on Google+ yesterday, group-chatting with your +pals and sharing circles or whatever? Statistics suggest the answer is probably no, you almost certainly weren't. But if you were, surely you got circle-shared the video Google released through the service about "Project Glass", the augmented reality glasses project from Google's Black Mesa-esque Google[x] team. Here's the video if you haven't caught it yet. You will be either excited or horrified—

In the video we see a man walking around in first person wearing the theoretical Google specs. He sends a text message by speaking it aloud. He turns to the sky and sees a weather icon to tell him what the weather he's looking at is like today. It even shows him where to find the music section in the world's tiniest bookstore. Spoiler alert— It's behind the shelf he's looking at. This technology would make it easy to do things that are already easy to do.



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There isn't even an anticipated release window for the glasses, as Google only launched the video because they "want to start a conversation and learn from your valuable input." It reads as though they're terrified of another failure and have no idea what features to include. So they've turned to the most reliable and steadfast of all groups— people on the Internet.



"Make it so I can always see new Bad Luck Brian memes and order Dominoes whenever I look at Dominoes ads and whenever I look at a comment section and yell 'FIRST' and I'll be first."
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I hate to be the one who has to tell Google this, but if they're going to make a killer product, it's got to come to their designers. Their team. There's a reason people out here in the real world don't invent technology. We're idiots. Remember the reception the iPad, what is now unequivocally the most successful tech product in the entire world, received when it was announced?



"BUHIT'SJUSTABIGiPHONEBUHBUHBUH."

And we mustn't forget— Google makes it money by way of advertising. They've been so successful at it because they catalogue your searches and give that information to advertisers. Then you get ads you're more likely to be interested in. Can you imagine all the data Google can mine you for if it's keeping track of everything you look at. I'm not suggesting Google would maliciously try to control you, I'm saying they would accidentally maliciously end up controlling you.

Granted, that seems paranoid even to me, but let's take the guy from the video as an example— he checks in at Hipster Doofus Bagels down the street. He gets a bagel from that spot twice a week at roughly the same time in the morning. Now Google knows what time and where bagel advertisements will be most effective.



"This WAS a great idea I had that my Google glasses suggested."
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That is super specific and exactly what advertisers are looking for. Instead of a shot-style approach to advertising, where Crest shows everyone watching The Big Bang Theory a commercial for toothpaste, even the people who don't brush their teeth. Now Crest can see how often you brush your teeth and send you a Crest ad when you're at the Walgreens toothpaste aisle. That is sniper rifle-accurate advertising. You can see how these glasses would totally change advertising, right? Does the shotgun/ sniper rifle comparison make sense? You play Halo, right?



Google wants to know exactly how much you play Halo.
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Am I worried about nothing? Or are Google glasses mayev just a little bit frightening? Let me know either in the comments below or on Twitter at @mikeyfromsu.

 


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