I'm Sorry I Got Caught Staring At Your Boobs

As an astute observer of human nature, I have noticed a trend of late that is quite disturbing to me.

Many women will wear ridiculously low-cut blouses, and then get mad at men for staring or looking their chestle regions.

Now, I am by no means a pervert or an ogler of any kind, nor am I the creepy old guy... But when a woman wears a blouse that borders on unintentional/intentional nip-slippage I chance a furtive glance. I can't help it, I'm a dude!

I'm very careful, so I rarely get caught sneaking a peek... though there have been a few times that I have actually been busted for looking, and then gotten a five-minute scolding telling me how rude my innocent glance was. It's like a puppy or a cute baby, you can't blame me for looking. They're adorable!

Thusly, I would like to take this opportunity to get a message out to all the ladies.

Ladies, I have to be honest... sometimes it feels like a trap. It's like hiking up a mountain trail... it's hot, it's dry and then suddenly someone puts an ice cream sundae in the middle of the path. Of course we're going to check it out! Who doesn't want a free ice cream sundae!? I for one am putting my foot down and will no longer take part in the bust-entrapment that you purvey upon the innocent male eyes of society.

The next time you are showing off the golden globes, and I happen to look, and you happen to catch me and ask if I was looking at your chest, I will stand tall with pride and reply honestly, "Yes, and they're quite lovely. Thank you for sharing them with the world!" And then I will brace for impact.

I'm not talking about perverts who stare or act inappropriately. I'm just talking about the reflex glance. Us guys truly mean no disrespect when we take a quick peek. Our eyes are drawn to flesh tones, God made us that way for the survival of our race! It's like when you are walking down the sidewalk and you think you see a dollar on the ground, and then it turns out to be trash. You don't know if it's a dollar until you take that second look, and it's almost impossible NOT to take the second look.

I don't mean to compare your boobs to trash on the ground, a more proper comparison would be the Mona Lisa. They are a true work of God given art and I thank you for whatever surface area you deem appropriate to share with the world. Just don't get mad at us when we admire your art display!

Have you ever fallen for the boob trap, and gotten busted? Tell us in the comments below!

 

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