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Japan Invents Burger Made Of Poop???

Posted By: Daniel Dominguez on 06.23.11

While American researchers are spending all their time coming up with new ways for old people to have long blonde hair and boners, a Japanese researcher , Mitsyuki Ikeda, has come up with a way to extract protein from human waste and turn it into meat. That's right: burgers made out of your crap.

(source)

The meat, pictured above, is intended to be a supplementary food source as resources become more scarce in the face of global warming, incredibly uneven food distribution, and population increases.

(source)

In other words, while the wealthy continue to chomp down on animal meat, the poor would be fed their own waste. Basically it's every dystopian nightmare anyone's ever thought of come true. On the plus side, the crap burgers apparently taste a lot like beef!

(source)

Ironically, however, right now because of the costs associated with making human ***t into food it's actually quite expensive to buy Mitsyuki's waste meat, which makes it a delicacy. Other delicacies include caviar, which is unfertilized fish eggs. So if you want to feel rich just sit down to a giant plate of human waste and unborn fish children. Mmmm the sweet taste of success!

(source)

The burgers are very healthy, high in protein, with carbohydrates and minerals. In other words, burgers made out of synthesized human waste are considerably better for you than Cheetos. So every time you eat a Cheeto, remember that what you're eating is less good for you than processed feces.

(source)

Seeing as Mitsyuki is referring to his invention as "sewage mud," I feel like he should really hire someone else to market it for him. Other better names for his crap burgers include: "Enjoya-bites," "Festering lumps of fun," and "Pretend this isn't happening patties."

This is a short video that begins with Mitsyuki staring creepily at his burger for too long and then goes into an interesting explanation of his process and motives. Now if only if he can figure out a way to isolate the carbohydrates in a stream of urine to make a side of fries.

Would you eat a human feces burger? Let us know in the comments!

Check Out These Amazing Japanese Scooters!

Tags: burger, crap, human, invention, japan, japanese, protein, waste

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91 Comments

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Listen2thischick

4 weeks ago

whats next human milk shakes?

trowzrz

9 weeks ago

The fridge at 1:35 says SHIT BURGER XD

Shakawakalakamosaka

11 weeks ago

1 min and 34 seconds pause it!! Even the Japanese know it is a "shit Burger" LMFAO

IvanBraginski

11 weeks ago

*Struggling to make a non-Hetalia-related comment* TOO FUHKING HARD! America would be pissed off. c:

TreeHugger101

11 weeks ago

I bet restruants in japan are gonna start sneaking laxatives into food.

PokeLink01

15 weeks ago

>:( IS THAT EVEN... NEVERMIND... ICK! WTF! WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM! HOW CAN HE EXPECT PEOPLE TO EAT THAT!

ceciliagraeme1

16 weeks ago

in the vidio the fridge says shit burgers XD

EpicAngel889

17 weeks ago

...i would never eat that...-_-

winner31177

35 weeks ago

GROSS who would even eat that!!!!

winner31177

35 weeks ago

Thats discusting

BlackhawksGirl19

36 weeks ago

ewwww!

sexyboi15

42 weeks ago

shit burgers o.O

xX Insanity Xx

44 weeks ago

OMG that was delightful huh?
I am DEFINITELY now a vegetarian this thing almost made me puke!!

timoxxxx

44 weeks ago

Next up, puke soup?

Melissauce

45 weeks ago

SHlT** :p

Melissauce

45 weeks ago

I like how the fridge says "candy BURGER" candy just got real...

Melissauce

45 weeks ago

I like how the fridge says "candy BURGER" candy just got real...

Melissauce

45 weeks ago

I like how the fridge said "candy BURGER" candy just got real..

Melissauce

45 weeks ago

I like how the fridge said "candy BURGER" candy just got real..

Melodii

45 weeks ago

I was eating a samwhich, then I read this

Gir_is_awesome

45 weeks ago

eep.

MustacheManatee

46 weeks ago

i think i speak for all of us when i say EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

wolfblade08

46 weeks ago

WTF??????? gee thanks now I'm probably not going to eat meat anymore after seeing that

Backoffmycheese

47 weeks ago

all of bear grylls' dreams are coming true :D

ashleymenard122

47 weeks ago

*YACKKKK*

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47 weeks ago

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47 weeks ago

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Eclectric

47 weeks ago

I bet in that dystopian situation, there will be a group of assassins that rob and murder the rich, then eat their remains. And I can only imagine that the candy-eating would become a political campaig

Krunkenstein

47 weeks ago

Human centipede for people not attached to other people D:

Strawberry2136

47 weeks ago

The fridge says sh*t burger :D

CannonPenisIsAwesome

47 weeks ago

i just have to ask... how does he kmow it tastes like beef?

HeyAsian

48 weeks ago

Thats gross
Looks all soggy and wet like when Ian dropped the burger in the water bucket in the If Cartoons Were Real Video xD

howtdowg

48 weeks ago

At :10 he poops because he makes a farting noise.

g45kh

48 weeks ago

Maybe if i was on the brink of death would eat a sh*t burger...

zorgon641

48 weeks ago

i gagged at this o.O

zorgon641

48 weeks ago

i gagged at this o.O

zorgon641

48 weeks ago

i gagged at this o.O

monkeybananas424

48 weeks ago

THATS GROSS

pedropickles

48 weeks ago

this just sums up japan doesnt it.

Ice Lemur73

48 weeks ago

Dude thats totally gross Japan=Win?

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48 weeks ago

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Dark9

48 weeks ago

@ MissPiggy334 Um...Since its not made of actual meat. wouldn't Vegetarians still be allowed to eat it? They did comment that it was a meat substitute...I still wouldn't eat one though XD.

Dark9

48 weeks ago

@ MissPiggy334 Um...Since its not made of actual meat. wouldn't Vegetarians still be allowed to eat it? They did comment that it was a meat substitute...I still wouldn't eat one though XD.

MissyPiggy334

48 weeks ago

times like these im happy im vegetarian

meegansaysrawr

48 weeks ago

So. Wrong.

Jkjk7

48 weeks ago

I wouldn't eat that. Partially because I'm poor and probably will never be convenient or inexpensive to process. And partially because it sounds really disgusting.

kittykatkat101

48 weeks ago

ya...I'm just going to become a vegetarian if eating a crap burger is my last option. In fact, I might just become a vegetarian after reading that lol barf

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48 weeks ago

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