Japanese Woman Invents A Menstruation Machine For Men?!

All guys say to themselves pretty regularly, "God, what I wouldn't give to be able to buy a machine that would let me experience the pain of menstruation." Thanks to Japan, that wish has now come true. The invention of a menstruation machine proves true Albert Einstein's most famous quote, "If there is one absolute mathematical certainty it is that any species, if given a long enough time line, will eventually create a machine so that men can bleed out of their schlong."

 

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Pretty much everybody likes menstruating. So it makes sense that Hiromi Ozaki, a Japanese student at the Royal College of Art created one.

 

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Hiromi created the machine so that men could experience the pain and bleeding associated with having a period. Thanks a lot Hiromi, like men don't already have it bad enough getting paid more than women and not having boobs so they can fit into tight spaces easier.

 

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Hiromi says she also intends the machine for women, oddly, since according to her technological advances in contraception might one day make menstruation obsolete. Why Hiromi would think it would be a good idea for menstruation machines to exist if nobody had to menstruate anymore is beyond me. Either way it's clear that her evil plans must be stopped.

 

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Japanese people can lay claim to many of the technological advances in the world today. From powerful video game systems to revolutionary automobiles to whatever the hell this picture is of to a thing you can strap onto yourself so you can experience cramps. So I ask: is there nothing they can't do? And by can't, I mean won't.

Here is a video Hiromi made to explain the machine and give an example of its use. Good luck enjoying it. (WARNING: MESSED UP!) 

 

 

What most excites you about finally getting to menstruate? Let us know in the comments!

 

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