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Lindsay Lohan To Pose Naked For Playboy?

It looks like Lindsay Lohan is going to be posing nude for Playboy! In other top stories, the Friends spin-off Joey has been cancelled and Senator John Kerry appears to not be entirely consistent in his political views. Oh, those aren't top stories? You'll have to forgive me, I thought this was 2004.

Pictured: A countdown clock at zero.
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Talk about missing your moment. Can you imagine a Lindsay Lohan Playboy spread at the height of her popularity and public goodwill? In 2004 people wanted to see Lindsay Lohan naked because she was the most beautiful girl in the world. In 2011 seeing Lindsay Lohan naked is like going to your friend's house on Thanksgiving and his aunt who smokes has had just a little too much wine and you have to ask her politely to take her hand off your knee, thanks.

"And a Happy Thanksgiving to you."
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It sounds as though there was a a bit of a negotiation between the Lohan and Playboy camps. The initial offer from Playboy was reportedly in the 750,000 dollar range, while Lohan pushed for one million. The final deal is said to be closer to Lindsay's number but I do feel the urge to remind everyone that Jesus Christ that is a lot of money. Especially when all she has to do is show up and take her clothes off. A lot of times I feel like the hardest part of my day is putting clothes on.

"I wish someone would pay me one million dollars and make the decision for me."
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I don't know, I can't imagine myself being turned on by Lindsay Lohan at this point in her life. I mean, she's taking part in this photo shoot in between court-ordered stints of community service at the LA county morgue. Like, when this Playboy comes out, you'll be looking at a girl who is trying to get right with the law by moving dead people around like Tetris blocks. You know that feeling you're feeling right now? Yeah, that's called hesitancy.

"Abandon sexuality all ye who enter here."
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Is it better to see Lindsay Lohan naked far, far too late than to never see her naked at all? Let us know your thoughts in the comments!

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Tags: lindsay, lohan, mean girls, nude, playboy, Thanksgiving