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Prisoner SUES To Gain Access To P0rn, Video Games???

Posted By: Desi Jedeikin on 07.05.11

So get this…21-year-old Kyle Richards, a prison inmate, is suing the state of Michigan because it has banned him from having pornography in his cell at the Macomb County Jail. Let’s get a looksie at this fool, who is suing to get a lookie at some nookie:

(source)

He claims he suffers from 'chronic masturbation syndrome' and that not allowing him porn constitutes cruel and unusual punishment and that his civil rights are being violated. Wait...so bopping the baloney is like, an official disease now? I thought it was just a thing, you know, that everyone does...for like for fun.

(source)

But NOOO...it's way more than that for chronic shank cranker, Kyle! He says that he suffers extreme sexual discomfort and that he needs the pornography to treat his "illness.”

Oh yeah…he also needs access to video games. Sounds more like a case of extreme ballsiness to me!

(source)

Now, this is the third lawsuit filed by Richards…who obviously thinks he’s some kind of trailblazer for the rights of criminal chicken chokers. I kind of get it in a way. I mean it's probably hard to find something to fantasize about in prison...it's not like your cellmates look like this:

(source)

They look more like this, but with lots of neck tattoos:

(source)

“Sexual deprivation has been used against plaintiff in a way as to both sexually frustrate the plaintiff, deprive the plaintiff of any sort of sexual gratification, and deny the plaintiff his right to sexual reproduction," Richards wrote in his hand written brief. That boy LOVES working with his hands! And another thing...dude, that is NOT how you make babies!

(source)

Richards has just pleaded guilty to robbing a bank. I feel obligated to say that maybe that wasn’t a gun in his pocket. Maybe he was just happy to see the bank teller and was just trying to, ahem, make a deposit? I shudder to think of the custom-made gamer porn he was probably planning on buying for himself with his bank loot. Leave Princess Peach out of this, you sicko!

(source)

Luckily for Richards, after he is sentenced, he will be incarcerated in the state penitentiary, where they do allow inmates access to porn. Then he can exercise his rights all he wants.

What do you think? Should prisoners have access to porn and video games in the clink? Or is that just part of the punishment? Let’s discuss in the comments!

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Tags: access, chronic, for, games, masturbation, porn, pornography, prisoner, sues, to, video

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32 Comments

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IvanBraginski

5 weeks ago

You spelt "sews" wrong in the title. Just letting you know.

Armorwolf

46 weeks ago

They don't really have the right for anything but a bed, a toilet, food, and a living space in jail so... no they shouldn't have porn. .3.

lasafras

46 weeks ago

FOLLOW THESE STEPS 1. COVER YOUR MOUTH WITH YOUR HAND 2. WHISPER A WISH INTO YOUR HAND 3. POST THIS ON TO TEN OTHER COMMENTS 4. NOW LOOK AT YOUR HAND

SweetsFTW

46 weeks ago

Hm...Prisoner=someone who did something bad. Porn=good. No, immates shouldn't have porn. Especially since they have eachother. :)

dinowolfgal

46 weeks ago

There is no such thing as a cronic disorder for masturbation. Every guy does it, no matter what they say. And they don't need porn to do it. Just close your eyes and imagine some naked girls (or guys

Rockchick_Jenny

46 weeks ago

I think it's a part of the punishment...I mean GOD!! xD

AgentZero_rules

46 weeks ago

Every male suffers from chronic male masturbation, but every young male in prison suffers from the effects of the "dropping the soap in the shower" moment.

BlackKittyKat12

46 weeks ago

Woops messed up in commenting sorry!!

BlackKittyKat12

46 weeks ago

Ugh that dirty bastard it's not a syndrome it's an ADDICTION plus I want to punch him for bring princess peach in this!!!!

bteam

46 weeks ago

Why should he get porn? he is a criminal!

tooawesome4u

46 weeks ago

ughh, that's just disgustingg

NyanCat2

46 weeks ago

It should be like my school's internet.

GOOGLE IMAGES ONLY!

You can get something here and there, but the rest are just boner kills.

superfucker

46 weeks ago

yes,because I might get mad drunk some time and the should also have access to smosh

fujibud

46 weeks ago

porn will make it less likely people get raped, as long as it's one at a time. If not, well thats fanning the flame ya know what I mean!

hollie-can-smosh-it

46 weeks ago

i think that porn shouldn't be allowed. have them use their imagination!!! as for video games, who the f*ck cares??

hollie-can-smosh-it

46 weeks ago

i think that porn shouldn't be allowed. have them use their imagination!!! as for video games, who the f*ck cares??

emkizzle

46 weeks ago

Porn should totally be allowed. Just think about how uncomfortable cell mates will feel.

Tulky

46 weeks ago

I think Porn SHOULD be allowed in prison, but it should be of low quality and maybe even get "Mixed Up" most of the time, just to raise; Anticipation; Tension between cell mates; and annoyances. -- If

Tulky

46 weeks ago

Tulky

46 weeks ago

salvi

46 weeks ago

Yeah, being deprived of fun things is kind of the point of being in prison..

On another note, not having access to porn doesn't stop you from yaking the monkey -_-"

.. Wanker.

Zephira

46 weeks ago

You are in Jail, you lose some of your "rights" as a citizen when you break the rules :)

givemefood

46 weeks ago

it's just you

jacob3759

46 weeks ago

I think he misunderstod when they said he was doing hard time.

Insanity_within

46 weeks ago

Is it only me or does this Kyle Richards kinda look like what Anthony might look like if he let himself go? no offence to Anthony or smosh of course (sorry if it did)

Fufu008

46 weeks ago

7th?