The Seven Deadly Sins of Twitter
Have you ever considered how extremely hard it is to convey any kind of message in 140 characters or less? Certainly if you have a Twitter, you know that by now. And I'm sure you also know about all the other stupidity that comes along with it, but to no fault of Twitter itself. Not all users of Twitter have a basic grasp at what should and should not be acceptable to post on this website, so here is a list of the seven deadly sins of twitter. Obey or be prepared to be smitten down by the interwebs Gods!
1) Imitating Celebrities
There's a little moment of happiness that explodes inside of someone when they see their favorite celebrity has chosen to reply to them or follow them. But more often than not, it turns out to be someone just disguising their profile to make it look like said celebrity. Imagine how you would feel if the dreamy Harry Styles winked at you in real life, only to find out that it wasn't actually the curly haired heartthrob himself, and was instead some lonely and unattractive internet addict disguised in a mask. Totally crushed, right? It's the exact same feeling you get, only virtually, when being scammed into believing one of these phony accounts. The accounts have even worked out how to nearly fake Twitter verification symbols to trick people even more! The Gods of the internet frown upon you if you commit this sin.
2) Connecting Other Media Sites
Remember that time period where Facebook would automatically post any news article you read online, thus ending up with extremely awkward titles all over your profile for your friends to see? Well connecting other sites to your Twitter to tweet any time you do any activity is kind of like that. It's cool if you want people to see when you upload a video to YouTube from time to time and not have to worry about remember tweeting the link. The same goes for posting something via Tumblr, Facebook, or any site, really. But you might want to worry a bit about clogging up your followers’ homepages and annoying them with all the notifications of you liking cat videos on YouTube. Not to mention any other embarrassing stuff you may doing while lurking the internet. It’s best for both the sanity of you and your followers alike to not commit this sin.
#Is #it #just #me #or #do #hashtags #act #like #commas #and #you #take #a #second #to #pause #before #reading #the #next #word #and #it #makes #you #sound #like #a #robot #? While hashtagging could be a good way to search up stuff others are doing similar to you, share your interests, or be funny things for the Twitterverse to come together and joke about (Such as the recent #ReplaceSongLyricsWithNutsack trend), over-indulging by hashtagging your entire life just gets on everybody's nerves. #IMeanSeriously #WhoEvenUsesHashtagsAnymore? #TheTwitterGodsWouldTotallyDisapprove
So now we're on to not just ANY hashtag, but probably the most annoying hashtag there is in existence. I get it, you want followers. It seems that that's what Twitter is all about-the number of people who are actually willing to put up reading your tweets to find out what you're doing in life. But should these even count as real follows? It's just a bunch of people who are self-conscious about their tweets and believe they wouldn't be able to actually earn their follows, so they bribe their own act of following to other tweet-conscious people who are just as greedy as them. #TeamFollowBack should be banished from Twitter to please their Gods, who are probably currently contemplating how their land is ruled by such follower-greedy morons.
5) "Retweet If...."
"Retweet if you're resting your head in your left hand right now!" "Retweet if your legs are crossed while reading this!" "Retweet if you like food!" "Retweet if you're breathing!" "Retweet if *generic thing that almost every single person does or enjoys*!" We get it, you want people to see your tweet and spread it around. Next time, make it interesting and perhaps people will actually retweet it without feeling pressured.
From time to time you might want to tweet a nice selfie just to show you're actually feeling pretty good about yourself. But there are just some people who tweet far too many selfies that are cringe-worthy. Amanda Bynes is the perfect example. Need I say more?
Oversharing in person is one thing. Oversharing on Twitter is a completely different story. On Twitter, your followers are bound to get annoyed if you give explicitly share things that are best kept in your own mind. Or worse, oversharing on Twitter could lead to hundreds of people seeing and spreading around your tweet and laughing at your misery, like this dude. Poor guy, as if getting something stuck up your butt isn't embarrassing enough, now the whole Twitterverse knows of it. If only he wouldn't have committed the seventh, and most unforgiving, deadly sin of Twitter.
Are you a sinner or a saint when it comes to Twitter? Let us know in the comments below!