Teen Movie Cliches That Don't Happen in Real Life
Entertainment for teens, like all entertainment, can be a pretty mixed bag. There’s a lot of really interesting stuff, some of which can even take adults back to those glory days. But teen movies ... well, teen movies are mostly duds. A lot of the same conventions, used over and over, and clichés that don’t even make sense. Which clichés am I referring to? I love that you get right to the point, baby!
The Slow Clap
That thing where one person starts to clap, then everyone joins them, and then everyone is screaming in celebration? Doesn’t happen. People only ever really clap unprompted at the end of a movie (for some reason). You can get all the girls, or catch all the winning footballs, or expose all the corrupt school deans you want, and the people around you are going to at best pat you on the back, and say “Hey, nice work.”
Someone Hiding In Women’s Washroom
For some reason, characters in teen movies (almost always some horned-up young male) think the best way to spy on women to get information, is to listen to them in the bathroom. Sure bud, “information”. Anyway, this is obviously insane. Perverts sit in restrooms, listening to women, because they are perverts, not because they want to find out if Cindy has a “thing” for them. And of course, they always get stuck in there when other people come in, and they just manage to escape without getting caught.
Cool Kids Versus Nerds
Does any school actually have its student body, split into cool “haves”, and uncool “have nots”? It seems like real high schools are just comprised of different groups of students, split up by their common interests. Also, they tend to fraternize outside of those groups, at least occasionally, making the idea of some sort of civil war pretty unlikely.
Loser’s Devotion Impresses Dream Girl
Secretly following a woman around, crushing on her, writing her name everywhere, and then coming up with some grand gesture to “make her fall in love with you” is, for all intents and purposes, stalking. It’s also illegal. But outside of its legality, all it really does is make the woman you’re doing it to DEEPLY uncomfortable, which is bad for her, and bad for your chances of having her be romantically interested in you. But your main focus should that it’s bad for her.
Having A Feud With A Teacher
Want to know how a feud with a teacher will most likely go? You won’t actually pull off a series of wacky pranks on each other. If you're poor, you'll most likely be kicked out of your terrible, publicly-funded school, and forced to find a new one. But if you're rich, then good news! Your wretched, spoiled little ass can you have your teacher fired, because I don’t think there’s a private school in the country that has a union to stand up for its teachers. Total running time of THAT movie? Six minutes.
Students From Different Backgrounds Learn About Each Other
Oh, so we’re to believe that all it takes to understand someone is to spend some time with them? Nope. The kids in these movies always develop a friendship with the person they formerly loathed, because now they understand each other. NOPE! In reality, the other person’s dumb opinions are just going to back up how you felt about them in the first place, and then some.
Teens Look Like Actors Who Are In Their Thirties
Come ON casting department, you’re not even trying with some of these guys!
What other lies have you told us, movies?! Let us know in the comments!