Very Best Of FMyLife: Google Edition
Google great because it gives us access to pictures of things that sexually arouse the deviants of other cultures! But sometimes Google can do pretty bad things too, like be so powerful that no one could ever defeat it. That's where FMylife comes in, collecting the worst moments of our lives, all in one place. Here are some of the best Google moments this week!
Make A List Of Everyone They've Ever Loved, Then Begin The Revenge
Today, I found out my parents have a list of everything I have ever Googled. FML
The Only Way Out Is Death
Today, I have come to the point in my life where I need to Google how to stop excessive back sweat. FML
You Should Have Been Less Funny In Bed
Today, I Googled my ex-husband only to find that in the years since we've split he now fancies himself as a stand-up comic. His material? Our sex life. FML
I Bet You Live In The First World
Today, I was so bored I googled the word "bored." The results were boring. FML
Also, There Were 11 People In The Car
Today, I looked at my house in Google Street View for the first time and noticed an unfamiliar vehicle in the driveway. When I asked my wife about it, she admitted to have an ongoing affair. Apparently the entire world knew my wife was having an affair before I did. FML
Today, I was on the internet with my Dad looking up information about allergies. I began to type 'allergies' into the Google Search Box and as I typed 'a', the phrase 'amazing sex positions' popped up as a search I had already looked up. My Dad asked me if any of the positions worked out. FML
He'll Admire Your Initiative?
Today, my boss came up to my desk to talk about a new project. He came up to my monitor so we can go to a website. My browser had frozen and I couldn't close it. The tabs I had open: Facebook, Gmail, Careerbuilder, Monster, and Resume Samples. FML
She Must Be Destroyed
Today, I Googled myself. I found my mugshot and a blog my mom had written about how much of a problem child I am. FML
What? Really? No. Really?
Today, I walked into my bathroom to find my girlfriend applying my deodorant. This would have been fine, if she wasn't applying it to her mouth. I don't think deodorant helps with bad breath, but a quick Google search shows that it does help with herpes. FML
For more, check out FMyLife.com!