Video Game Bosses That Would Make Great Real-Life Bosses!
I've had some pretty bad bosses in my life, but at least they've never shot fireballs or threw hammers at me. But I don't think it would be fair to say that all video game bosses would make bad real-life bosses — quite the opposite, in fact! Here are some video game bosses that I think could be really great at managing any office.
They may not be obvious, but all managers have a ton of different responsibilities, and the three-headed Hydra from God of War, I would imagine, would be inately good at delegating those responsibilities to himself. One head can do all the hiring, one head can handle the day-to-day scheduling, and one head can the killing and eationg of beligerent employees. Also finances. That third head would have to handle the killing and eating of belligerent employees and the finances.
If the bomb-making expert from Metal Gear Solid 2 were your boss, you just know he'd bring donuts into the office, like, every day. And yes, some of them might explode. But some of them might NOT explode. So.
If Resident Evil 3's The Nemesis is half as persistent with employee developement as he was catching and murdering S.T.A.R.S, corporate can expect big things from his department.
Whenever I'm at work, trying to file reports on time and do other work-things, my boss is always looming over my shoulder, double checking everything, asking me questions. It's like, how about you just stay one lava pit away from me behind a sheet of glass so thick it can only be penetrated by missles, all right Phil?
With Mike Tyson as a boss, I would know what I'm gonna get — if I do well, I get a compliment. If I screw up, I get an uppercut. And even though the resulting spinal damage from said uppercut would make me unable to walk or eat or even breathe on my own ever again, I'll take that over office politics any day.
Listen, you've got an internet connection. You know that whenever you're arguing with someone and they bring up Hitler, that person's contention is instantly seen as hyperbolic and they lose the debate. Now imagine you have a disagreement with your boss, Wolfenstein 3D's Robot Hitler:
"Oh thanks SOOO much for taking my position seriously, boss."
"I am taking your position seriously! I think you're a valuable employee —"
"Then why do you keep bringing up ROBOT HITLER?"
"I'm not bringing up Robot Hitler! I AM ROBOT HITLER! Those are different things!"
But it won't matter because corporate will give you a raise and Robot Hitler will get a stern talking to about running his office like an internet forum.
Which boss would you most want running your office? Let me know on Twitter at @mikeyfromsu or in the comments below!