What If Madonna Was Your Mom?
The Huffington Post just reported a story about Madonna's rules for her daughter Lourdes. Lourdes, who goes by "Lola," was with her superstar mom at the launch of their new collaboration, the teenage clothing line "Material Girl." Madonna talked about the rules she sets for Lola, who is 13. Which got us thinking, what if Madonna was your Mom?
Madonna says she won't let Lola dye her hair until she's 14. That seems fair enough, right? I mean, what color is she gonna dye her hair anyway, purple?! When I was 14 I put some peroxide on my hair because I had no idea what the hell was going on. I think I saw it on the Brady Bunch. No, that was removing your freckles with lemon juice. Poor Jan Brady.
No, Lola's not dating this smoking hot dude... that's her dad... Lola acutally isn't allowed to date until she's 14 according to Madonna. Reporters actually asked Lola if she had boyfriends and was dating at he press conference for the launch of her new clothing line "Material Girl. Madonna shook her head in disgust. Disgust? What's disgusting about dating, Madonna? I mean, Lola's a cute girl, and if Madonna was my mom I'd be texting all kinds of things (not slutty things) to boys from the privacy of my 3 story bedroom.
Lola was asked about Madonna's parenting skills, and she said "I think she's doing a really good job!" Yeah, I think so too. If Madonna was my mom that's exactly what I'd say because I wouldn't want to get my million dollar a month credit line cut off!
There was no mention about working out, even though everyone knows Madonna is OBSESSED with working out. If Madonna was your mom, do you think she'd make you drop and give her 20 every ten minutes?
If Madonna was your mom, you’d get to hang out with her hot younger boyfriend named Jesus, who is actually closer in age to Lola than he is Madonna. Which actually would be cool, because when your friends ask what you're doing, you could say "I'm talking to Jesus." And in this case, Jesus would be super hot.
About their Material Girl clothing line, the Huffington Post reports, "The pair claims to have had few creative differences, but when they did, all arguments were resolved withm, "an arm wrestle and whoever won, won," Madonna said. When your mom has burly Madonna arms, this is probably not fair.
Madonna describes herself as one of those moms who says things like, "You can't wear this," "You can't wear that." Sure, fine. But if Madonna was your mom you could dress exactly like her from the 80's, and look super cool, and get the best clothes in the whole entire world, right??
Finally, if Madonna was your mom, you'd know a ton of famous people and it would be no big deal. This would be a good thing because you could always get a cool job when you're grown up. It could also be a bad thing because you'd never know anyone normal. I mean, it's Madonna! Do you really think she knows anyone normal???
What do you think? What would it be like if Madonna was your mom? Do you think it would be cool? Good, bad, or sucky?