You Can Be Buried In Japan... With Hello Kitty?

I spend a lot of time thinking about where my eternal soul is going to end up after I die, and whether it's heaven, hell, purgatory, the next level of reincarnation, or Kansas City, I have one hope: That I'll still be able to enjoy the adorable antics and minimalist design of Hello Kitty.



Pictured: My eternal reward.
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Thankfully, Japan has made it a little easier for me to sleep at night — there is no way my soul isn't going to end up somewhere with Hello Kitty if I'm buried in a new Hello Kitty casket!



朝’‘阿佐’‘麻 Hooray death! 安佐’‘アサ !
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Some people might be kind of embarrassed to spend eternity with a Hello Kitty, but if that's what you loved in life, get buried in it in death, I always say. And besides, the casket will be underground. No one will know you've chosen to sum up your life with Hello kitty besides you. It's not like Japan's making Hello Kitty gravestones or anythi—



Sonofabitch.
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Come on Japan, death is supposed to be somber. Hello Kitty is the opposite of somber. Hello Kitty is pure joy being blasted into the face of happy children while they eat brightly colored lollipops and sing songs about jumprope. We should be burying people with iconography related to the opposite of joy. I don't know what that is, specifically, but I'm damn sure gonna Google it.



Don't ever Google "opposite of joy".
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What cartoon character are you going to have on your casket? Let us know in the comments!

 


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