The Basic Rules of Insect Ethics and Etiquette

To kill or not to kill...that is the question.

Spring is here and Summer is just around the corner. And that means an onslaught of bugs, big and small. Some of these are good and some of these are bad. Some helpful and some hurtful. Many deserve the harshest treatment, while others are worthy of mercy.

But what fate for each is hard to decide. Smosh is here to supply this handy guide of instructions for what to do with which bug -- so your place is clean.

And so is your conscience.


Flies


Kill Score: Medium

Try to get them to fly out of a window or something because they are really fast and elusive, making them hard to kill. But if you can smash them, do so. Aim a little behind them when you attempt this, because when flies take off, they do so in reverse.

They spend a lot of time on dog poop and then on your food that they eat by vomiting on it to begin the digestive process. Then sucking it into their mouths. Gross.


Bees


Kill Score: Low

It is good to let them out if you can. Sometimes they are just wandering around and appear drunk so you can pick them up in some toilet paper and release them outside. Do not kill them. They pollinate flowers and make honey...both of which are nice.


Ants


Kill Score: High

Kill them. Kill them all. They will keep coming, though. They leave a special trail for their friends back at the anthill that they will follow forever. The path must be destroyed. Ant traps, Ant spray or any other household spray like furniture polish or deodorizer will do the trick.

Spiders


Kill Score: Low-Medium

Spiders under a certain size -- like a dime -- should be spared. Pick them up in some paper and carry them out. Larger spiders should be spared if possible, but if they look threatening then it’s okay to crush and flush. Spiders eat bugs, which is good. But they also bite. Be advised, though...it is bad luck to kill a spider. Proceed at your own risk.


Cock Roaches


Kill Score: High

Roaches are no good. They are hard to spot and mostly come out when it is dark. Go in the kitchen and stealthily turn on the lights to surprise them. You will only have a second, so act quickly. They are the rats of the insect world and serve no useful purpose. Kill at will.


Silver Fish


Kill Score: High

Silver fish are ugly. They have those longish bodies and creepy antennae. It is not entirely clear what they do or why they are in your house but they can scare the crap out of you when you see them. Feel free to exercise your right to end their rotten lives.


Moths


Kill Score: Low

Moths eat your sweaters, fly into the television and make quite a racket. Even though they are destructive and loud they should not be killed because they are really slow and easily caught. Trap them in a tissue and release them into the night.


Mosquitoes


Kill Score: High

These are the most dangerous animals on the planet. They suck your blood, carry and spread disease and kill more people than all the other animals on earth combined. No mercy should be shown for these despicable creatures.


Mosquito Eaters


Kill Score: Low

Mosquito Eaters eat mosquitoes and other bugs so they should be protected. They are really freaky looking with their extended thoraxes and big wings, but they should be left completely alone. They are doing your work for you so it’s good to have them around -- despite their unusual appearance.